Mae West's Best quintessential characters. Click EasyEdit to update this page!
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| Mae West Best Movies and Characters
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| | Character Quotes & Catchphrases | - Tira: Beulah, peel me a grape.
- Jack Clayton: You were wonderful tonight.
Tira Yeah, I'm always wonderful at night.
Jack Clayton: Tonight, you were especially good.
Tira: Well... When I'm good, I'm very good. But, when I'm bad...
[winks at Jack]
Tira: I'm better. - Tira: It's not the men in your life that counts, it's the life in your men.
- Tira: [to Slick Wiley] What'd you do? Get your hair cut or have your ears moved down?
- Tira: What do you do for a living?
Ernest Brown: Oh, uh, sort of a politician.
Tira: I don't like work either. - Jack Clayton: Oh I'm crazy about you.
Tira: I did my best to make you that way.
Jack Clayton: Look darling, you need a rest, and so do I. Let me take you away somewhere, we'll...
Tira: Would you call that a rest?
Jack Clayton: What are you thinking about?
Tira: Same thing you are. - [after he reads her fortune, Rajah gives Tira the horoscope he has prepared for her]
Rajah the Fortune Teller: Keep this where you may consult it frequently.
Tira: Alright, I'll take it to bed with me. - Tira: Always remember, honey. A good motto is: "Take all you can get and give as little as possible". Don't forget, honey. Never let one man worry your mind. Find 'em, fool 'em and forget 'em!
- Tira: By the way, honey, you married or single?
Ernest Brown: Married five times.
Tira: Five times? Wedding bells must sound like an alarm clock to you. - Rajah the Fortune Teller: You were born in August.
Tira: Yeah, one of the hot months. - Rajah the Fortune Teller: I see a man in your life.
Tira: What? Only one?
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Plot: Rightly suspected of illicit relations with the Masked Bandit, Flower Belle Lee is run out of Little Bend. On the train she meets con man Cuthbert J. Twillie and pretends to marry him for "respectability." Arrived in Greasewood City with his unkissed bride, Twillie is named sheriff by town boss Jeff Badger...with an ulterior motive. Meanwhile, both stars inimitably display their specialties, as Twillie tends bar and plays cards, and Flower Belle tames the town's rowdy schoolboys...
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| | Character Quotes & Catchphrases | - Schoolboy: We was doin' arithmetic on the blackboard when Miss Foster took sick.
Flower belle Lee: Oh, arithmetic... I was always pretty good at figures myself. - Judge: Are you trying to show *contempt* for this court?
Flower Belle: No... I'm doin' my best to *hide* it! - Cuthbert J Twillie: May I present my card?
Flower Belle Lee: 'Novelties and Notions.' What kind of notions you got?
Cuthbert J. Twillie: You'd be surprised. Some are old, some are new. Whom have I the honor of addressing, m'lady?
Flower Belle Lee: Mmm, they call me Flower Belle.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: Flower Belle, what a euphonious appellation. Easy on the ears and a banquet for the eyes.
Flower Belle Lee: You're kinda cute yourself.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: Thank you. I never argue with a lady.
Flower Belle Lee: Smart boy. - Flower Belle Lee: Mmm, funny, every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.
- Flower Belle Lee: Any time you got nothin' to do and lots of time to do it, come up.
- Cuthbert J. Twillie: I will be all things to you: father, mother, husband, counselor, jackanapes, bartender...
Flower Belle Lee: You're offering quite a bundle, honey.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: My heart is a bargain today. Will you take me?
[she sneaks a look at his satchel full of what she thinks is money]
Flower Belle Lee: I'll take you - and how. - [giving schoolboys an arithmetic lesson]
Flower Belle Lee: Two and two is four and five will get you ten if you know how to work it. - Wayne Carter: Spring is the time for love.
Flower Belle Lee: What's the matter with the rest of the year? - Flower Belle Lee: I generally avoid temptation... unless I can't resist it.
- Cuthbert J. Twillie: Babydoll, these weed-benders have been running off at the mouth... to your detriment.
Flower Belle Lee: Hmmm, I ain't surprised. Bad news travels fast.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: I understand you need a Cicero and guide.
Flower Belle Lee: I need more than that, honey.
[she places her arm on the seat back between them - he takes her hand]
Cuthbert J. Twillie: Ah, what symmetrical digits! Soft as the fuzz of a baby's arm.
Flower Belle Lee: But quick on the trigger.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: Mmm, yes. Uh, may I?
[kisses her fingers]
Flower Belle Lee: Help yourself.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: Would you object if I avail myself of a second helping?
Flower Belle Lee: Don't you think you're a little forward on such short acquaintance? You're compromising me. - Cuthbert J. Twillie: I've been worried about you, my little peachfuzz. Have you been loitering somewhere?
Flower Belle Lee: I've been learning things.
Cuthbert J. Twillie: Unnecessary! You are the epitome of erudition... a double superlative. Can you handle it?
Flower Belle Lee: Yeah, and I can kick it around, too. - Wayne Carter: I never argue - with a lady.
Flower Belle Lee: Play it safe, huh? - Flower Belle Lee [to Wayne Carter] You're a man with ideals. Well, I guess I better be goin' while you still got 'em.
- Flower Belle Lee [reading off the blackboard] "'I am a good boy. I am a good man. I am a good girl." What is this, propaganda?
- Wayne Carter: I think you could turn a man's head very easily if he wasn't careful.
Flower Belle: Well, there's no fun in being too careful.
Wayne Carter: Aren't you forgetting that you're married?
Flower Belle Lee: I'm doin' my best. - Jeff Badger: You are the sheriff wife now. It would be very embarrassing for you to know who I am.
Flower Belle Lee: Mmm... I've never been embarrassed in my life. - Wayne Carter: There's no such thing as law and order in this town. Decent citizens live in fear of their lives.
Flower Belle Lee: That ain't right. There should be a law against it. - Jeff Badger: I'm Jeff Badger. I own this place. Is there anything I can do for you?
Flower Belle Lee: Yeah, you can get outta my way. - Jeff Badger: I wonder what kind of a woman you really are.
Flower Belle Lee: Too bad, but I can't give out samples. - Aunt Lou: These are right pretty pictures of you, Flower Belle.
Flower Belle Lee: Yeah, I like'em. They look just like me. - Flower Belle Lee: Don't mind being' held up, but I don't like the inconvenience.
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