- The real reason I decided on show business was to avoid a day job.
- (On why he chose to leave Saturday Night Live in 1994 after four seasons): "It was time to graduate."
- Women always feel like they`re being stared at and judged, and rightfully so.
- Studio people are idiots. Until they see someone else doing it and make a success of it, they don`t open their minds. Most of them are idiots.
- I try not to worry about what that`s going to look like. If you worry about looking stupid, that`s when you look really stupid.
- I try not to have too much of an ego. I`ll do anything.
- I lost that excitement I had when I first started out. It was all about the need to just get a job, and so I found the joy again when I was writing Deuce Bigelow. I was laughing so hard and along with my writing partner at the time, simply laughing until we cried.
- I like to sneak in under the radar. I don`t have any paparazzi following me or have to deal with that stuff. I`m never in the tabloids. I prefer that.
- First of all, weren`t all the best beatings in the trailer for "The Passion of the Christ"? I hate when the trailer gives away all the best stuff.
- A woman can laugh and cry in three seconds and it`s not weird. But if a man does it, it`s very disturbing. The way I`d describe it is like this: I have been allowed inside the house of womanhood, but I feel that they wouldn`t let me in any of the interesting rooms.
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