Movie/TV title:Quantum Leap (1989-1993)
Character name:Dr Samuel Beckett
Quote(s):Sam: It all started when a time travel experiment I was conducting went... a little ka-ka. In the blink of a cosmic clock I went from quantum physicist to air force test pilot. Which could have been fun... if I knew how to fly. Fortunately, I had help. An observer from the project named Al. Unfortunately, Al's a hologram, so all he can lend is moral support. Anyway, here I am. Bouncing around in time, putting things right which once went wrong. A sort of time traveling Lone Ranger, with Al as my Tonto. And I don't even need a mask. Oh boy.
Sam: I'm running track, Al.
Al: Oh, well look, you pump your arms and you pump your legs and drive through the tape.
Sam: You were a runner too?
Al: No, but it sounds good, doesn't it?
Al: There are five stages of love. The first is denial, then the second is sex, then there's acceptance, then there's divorce... and then there's more sex, if you're lucky.
Sam: Who wrote this textbook, you or Zsa Zsa?
Sam: Where the hell were you?
Al: I was at the Laker game. It went into overtime.
Sam: A ball game? I nearly died because you were at a ball game?
Al: It wasn't just a ball game. It was a play-off game. At the party later, I met this dish named Martha.
Sam: I guess I can thank God you didn't spend the night with this Martha.
Al: Well, I did.
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Movie/TV title:Sibling Rivalry
Character name:Harry Turner
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Movie/TV title:Necessary Roughness
Character name:Paul Blake
Quote(s):[a racquetball that Suzanne hits ricochets and hits Paul in the head]
Suzanne Carter: Oh my God, I'm sorry. Are you okay?
Paul Blake: No, actually. I just got hit in the head by a racquetball.
Andre Krimm: The next time I invite you out with the guys keep your white butt at home.
Paul Blake: But I thought you said you wanted to Paaar-teee?
Paul Blake: Manu, snap me the ball.
Coach Rig: SNAP THE BALL DAMN IT!
Paul Blake: Manu, Manu hike me the ball.
[Manumana snaps the ball poorly]
Lucy Draper: Relax big guy; you've already got the job.
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Movie/TV title:Color of Night
Character name:Dr. Bob Moore
Quote(s): Dr. Bob Moore: Why don't we cut through this macho **** and just drop our pants and see who has the bigger ****? Then we can go home, sit down and have a nice, civilized breakfast.
Dr. Bill Capa: It wouldn't be civilized.
Dr. Bob Moore: Why not?
Dr. Bill Capa: Because you'd be sulking!
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Movie/TV title:Murphy Brown (1993-1996)
Character name: Peter Hunt
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Movie/TV title:The Invaders.
Character name:Nolan Wood,
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Movie/TV title:Lord of Illusions
Character name:Harry D'Amour
Quote(s):Loomis: What's the story? Was the kid really possessed?
Harry D'Amour: Probably.
Loomis: You gonna tell me by what?
Harry D'Amour: Oh, you know, the usual.
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Movie/TV title:Mr. & Mrs. Smith (1996-13 episodes)
Character name:Mr Smith
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Movie/TV title:Cats Dont Dance
Character name:Danny
Quote(s):Sawyer: Look, tiger. This town has rules. Around here cats say, "Meow."
Danny: But that's so old hat. I'm sure no one would mind if I jazzed this up a bit.
Sawyer: Okay, learn it the hard way.
Danny: [dramiatic reading] Meow!
[as Gabby Hayes]
Danny: Meow! Dagnabit, meow!
[as Edward G. Robinson]
Danny: Meow, see? Yeah, that's it. Meow! Meow!
Danny: What if I could get you an audition with L.B. Mammoth?
Sawyer: L.B. Mammoth? Head of Mammoth Studios?
Danny: I'm sure he'd appreciate good talent.
Cranston: After nothing but Darla, he's gotta be starving for it!
Danny: Look, if you're going to accept what they think of you, then you can leave. I almost did.
Cranston: Well, you should have. Life here for animals is the pits. We're always playing the scapegoat.
Woolie Mammoth: Quickly forgotten.
Frances: Working for scale.
Danny: Then why are you still here? Because you can't get over that feeling, can you? That feeling you get when... when you two dance together. When you play. When you sing. They cursed you, humilliated you, even slammed the door on your face, but they haven't made you forget. Have they?
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Movie/TV title:Major League: Back to the Minors
Character name:Gus Cantrell
Quote(s):[Gus Cantrell is gaining consciousness after being knocked out with the ball]
Gus Cantrell: God?
Pedro Cerrano: No.
Gus Cantrell: Moses?
Pedro Cerrano: No, but you're getting warm.
Gus Cantrell: Cerrano.
Pedro Cerrano: [chuckles] Hello, Gus.
Gus Cantrell: [laughs, then grabs the back of his head in pain] Oh, Jesus Christ.
Pedro Cerrano: Be careful, now.
Gus Cantrell: You scared me to death!
Pedro Cerrano: Do you mean when you realized God is black?
Gus Cantrell: Yeah... I thought She was white.
Pedro Cerrano: [laughs]
Gus Cantrell: I must've been out a long time if it's Halloween already.
Pedro Cerrano: What's your point?
Leonard Huff: So are you a baseball fan?
Maggie Reynolds: As a matter of fact, I am.
Leonard Huff: Well, I manage a team. Minnesota Twins, may you've heard of them.
Gus Cantrell: Hmm, Minnesota Twins, may I've heard of them. You ********
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Movie/TV title:NetForce
Character name: Alex Michaels
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Movie/TV title:American Beauty
Character name:Jim Olmeyer
Quote(s):Lester Burnham: I figured you guys might be able to give me some pointers. I need to shape up. Fast.
Jim Olmeyer: Are you just looking to lose weight, or do you want increased strength and flexibility as well?
Lester Burnham: I want to look good naked!
Jim Olmeyer: Hello! We're your neighbors from two doors down and we just wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood!
[hands the Colonel a gift basket]
Jim "JB" Berkely: Everything's from our garden, except for the pasta.
Jim Olmeyer: Yes, it's from Fizzoli's, it's amazingly fresh, you just pop it in water and it's done! I'm Jim Olmeyer.
[shakes the Colonel's hand]
Jim Olmeyer: And this is my partner Jim.
Jim "JB" Berkely: Jim Berkely, but people call me J.B.
[extends his hand to shake]
Colonel Frank Fitts: Ah, let's just cut to it, what are you selling?
Jim Olmeyer: Nothing, we just wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood.
Colonel Frank Fitts: You said you're partners, so, uh what's your business?
Jim Olmeyer: Well, he's a tax attorney.
Jim "JB" Berkely: And he's an anesthesiologist.
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