Movie/TV Title:
No Country for Old Men2007Character Name:
Sheriff Ed Tom Bell | Quote(s):
Ed Tom Bell: Here last week they found this couple out in California. They rent out rooms for old people, kill'em, bury'em in the yard, cash their social security checks. Well, they'd tortur'em first, I don't know why. Maybe the television set was broke.
Ed Tom Bell: I always figured when I got older, God would sorta come inta my life somehow. And he didn't. I don't blame him.
If I was him I would have the same opinion of me that he does.
Wendell: [referring to the dead bodies in the desert] How come you reckon the coyotes ain't been at them?
Ed Tom Bell: I don't know. Supposedly, a coyote won't eat a Mexican.
Loretta Bell: Be careful.
Ed Tom Bell: I always am.
Loretta Bell: Don't get hurt.
Ed Tom Bell: I never do.
Loretta Bell: Don't hurt no one.
Ed Tom Bell: [smiles] Well. If you say so.
Ed Tom Bell: Now that's aggravatin'.
Wendell: Sheriff?
Ed Tom Bell: [points to a bottle of milk] Still sweatin'.
Wendell: Whoa, Sheriff! We just missed him! We gotta circulate this! On Radio!
Ed Tom Bell: Alright. What we circulate? Lookin' for a man who has recently drunk milk?
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Movie/TV Title:
The Fugitive
1993
Character Name:
Marshal Samuel Gerard
| Quote(s):
Dr. Richard Kimble: I didn't kill my wife.
Deputy Gerard: I don't care.
Deputy Gerard: Newman, what are you doing?
Newman: I'm thinking.
Deputy Gerard: Well, think me up a cup of coffee and a chocolate doughnut with some of those little sprinkles on top, while you're thinking.
Sheriff Rawlins: Okay boys, gather around here and listen up. We're shuttin' it down, Wyatt Earp's here to mop up.
Deputy Gerard: That's funny. Wyatt Earp.
Deputy Gerard: Look on your maps if you wanna know how to get there!
Deputy Gerard: That's my man.
Det. Rosetti: Not anymore, he's not. He's going down. You won't help us, you stay the hell out!
Deputy Gerard: Arrest us.
Head Illinois State Trooper: I don't want to tell you how to do your job...
Deputy Gerard: [on his police radio] Put the helicopter on the bridge!
Head Illinois State Trooper: ...but only one man in a million can survive that fall. The guy is fish food.
Deputy Gerard: Fine. Go get a cane pole, catch the fish that ate him.
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Movie/TV Title:
Men in Black
1997
Character Name:
Agent K (Kay)
| Quote(s):
Kay: Set for pulsar level five, subsonic implosion factor two.
Jay: What?
Kay: Just shoot the damn thing on the count of three.
Kay: Not bad for your second day of work, is it?
Jay: This definitely rates about a 9.0 on my weird-shit-o-meter.
Kay: You should've been here for the Zeronian migration in 1968.
Jay: You do know Elvis is dead, right?
Kay: No, Elvis is not dead. He just went home.
Kay: Imagine a giant cockroach, with unlimited strength, a massive inferiority complex, and a real short temper, is terror-assing around Manhattan Island in a brand-new Edgar suit. That sound like fun?
Jay: All right, I'm in. 'Cause there's some next level shit going on and I'm OK with that. But before y'all go beaming me up there's one thing you gotta remember: You chose me... so you recognized the skills, so I don't want nobody calling me son or kid or sport or nothing like that, cool?
Kay: Cool, whatever you say, slick, but I need to tell you something about all your skills. As of right now, they mean precisely... dick.
Kay: You're nothing but a smear on the Sports page to me, you slimy, ugly, intestinal parasite! Eat me! Eat me!
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Movie/TV Title:
Batman Forever
1995
Character Name:
Two-Face / Harvey Dent
| Quote(s):
Two-Face: One man is born a hero, his brother a coward. Babies starve, politicians grow fat. Holy men are martyred, and junkies grow legion.
Why? Why, why, why, why, why? Luck! Blind, stupid, simple, doo-dah, clueless luck!
Two-Face: Why can't you just die?
Two-Face: You have broken into our hideout. You have violated the sanctity of our lair. For this we should crush your bones into powder. However, you do pose a very interesting proposition: therefore, heads, we accept, and tails, we blow your damned head off!
Two-Face: You're counting on the winged avenger to deliver you from evil, aren't you my friend?
Bank Guard: Are you going to kill me?
Two-Face: Maybe, maybe not. You could say we're of two minds on the subject.
Two-Face: Don't worry people, no need for alarm, it's just a good-old fashioned, low-tech stick up! We're interested in the basics: cash, jewelry, cellular telephones. Just hand them over nicely, and no one will be hurt.
Two Face: Let's start this party with a bang.
Two-Face: Very punctual, even to his own funeral! Boys, kill the Bat!
[Two-Face decides a victim's fate with a coin toss] Two-Face: Ah. Fortune smiles. Another day of wine and roses. Or, in your case, beer and pizza!
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Movie/TV Title:
Lonesome Dove
1989
Character Name:
Woodrow F. Call
| Quote(s):
Woodrow Call: I'm American! By God!
Gus McCrae: You was born in Scotland, as I recall. You was still draggin' on the tit when they brought you over here.
Woodrow Call: I reckon I'm as American as anyone from Tennessee.
Woodrow Call: [after handing the gun to Newt] It is better to have it and not need it, then to need it and not have it.
Woodrow Call: [to the doctor] We can still take that other leg. Get him drunk and I'll hold him.
Gus McCrae: [pulling his pistol from under the blanket] No, sir; you ain't gettin' my leg. You don't boss me, Woodrow. I'm the only man you don't boss.
[Gus refuses to have his leg amputated knowing he will die if he doesn't]
Woodrow Call: What do you want legs for anyway? You don't like to do nothing but sit on the porch and drink whiskey!
Gus McCrae: I like to kick a pig every once in a while. How would I do that?
Woodrow Call: I hate rude behavior in a man. I won't tolerate it.
Clara Allen: Did you give that boy your name before you left Montana?
Woodrow Call: I gave him my horse.
Clara Allen: But not your name.
Woodrow Call: I value the horse more than my name.
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