Best to Worst 2008

Son of Rambow has a warm heart filled with imagination and wonder. Two boys set out to make a film based upon their common love for war movies i.e. First Blood. However tension arises when the boys film garners the interest of a popular upperclassman. Along with threats to their friendship from peer pressure and family the boys struggle to complete their vision.

This movie has all the charm and warmth of Be Kind Rewind along with character depth that that movie sorely needed.

Frenetically paced film that is both a faithful adaptation of the source material and a satisfying use of modern computer generated 3D film making. The race scenes were interesting but lose their appeal as the movie progresses. I liked it but wonder why they felt the need to make this "live action".

Sylvester Stallone is experiencing a nostalgic renaissance. Trudging through his back catalog of characters we find John Rambo living the life of a river boat captain just outside of war torn Burma. He spends his days catching King Cobras and his nights haunted by the past. His static malaise is broken by a group of missionaries led by an idealistic woman. The group wishes to go into Burma but the country is kind of a war zone. Rambo is not too keen on the idea but he just can't say no to this pretty little lady. Unfortunately and predictably the missionaries get into trouble with a Burmese warlord. Now the only thing between Rambo and the missionaries is a Burmese warlord (man it must suck to be a Burmese warlord.)

I liked the movie. It was very violent but most of it seemed computer generated and therefore blunted the visceral impact. I recognized the blood splatter to be similar to what was seen in 300 and Sin City.

The movie is simple and does not demand much of the ole intellect and just like Rocky Balboa we leave the character in a better place.

Its the feel good hit of the winter...

Cloverfield is a monster movie. It opens with a party of vapid New York socialites wishing bon voyage to one of their own, who intends to go to Japan. Our heroes record the entire event on their trusty camcorder which has an ever-enduring battery, night vision, and resistance to all types of military ordnance (unfortunately they did not procure a tripod with this model). An explosion interrupts the party conveniently around the same time our hero's girl friend arrives with another equally insipid twenty-something. The explosions and shrapnel encourages the party to disperse to the streets where they are greeted with the head of the statue of liberty which has been knocked across the city like a beach ball by God-only-knows-what. Our heroes sensibly follow the screaming crowd for a time attempting to escape the mysterious 9/11 like conflagration. They change their minds of course and are slowly widdled down in good old monster movie fashion. Oh yes there is a monster(s)?

In final analysis this movie left me quite shaken...

The trailer basically shows all the most creepy scenes. What is left is a mess of characters doing incredibly stupid things that eventually lead to their demise. If someone comes at me with an axe on my property at night I'm not going to cower in a room and wait for the inevitable...but then again I do live in Texas.

I also could have used some motivation for the killers. One character even asked, "why are you doing this?" the reply "Because you were home." Not good enough. And the closing murder scene was filmed sooo matter-of-factly I heard several people in the audience snicker. When it comes right down to it these killers who obviously spent some time planing elaborate schemes to terrorize the occupants simply huddle around their prey and stab them. I felt some of my humanity slip away when I yawned during the scene. A scene by the way that was filmed so much better by David Fincher in Zodiac (Which is on a whole a genuinely creepy movie-then again Fincher is a genius).

On the bright side this was not torture porn. Hopefully that fad is dying in American horror films.

The film generated nice atmosphere, I simply didn't feel anything for the characters. The killer's masks were somewhat creepy but in the end it is all style over substance.

The Eye is a safe and unassuming horror movie with few thrills or original ideas (it is after all a remake of an Asian horror movie). I would say that the only reason to see it is to ogel Jessica Alba, but I won't sink to that level of depravity. Although there is a rather tastefully gratuitous shower scene (hey! I already said that the movie plays it safe even with the sex). Our star Alba plays a successful classical musician who has been blind since the age of 5. She once had a retinal procedure but it did not take. Now as a result of stem-cell research a successful transplant operation has been performed (the stem-cell plot point is not pursued I guess it was too politico). It turns out that our star did not particularly want the operation but her sister feeling guilty persuaded her to have it (this angle is also not pursued leaving Parker Posey little to do). After a short period of blurry shaky cam shots our star's vision returns with the added ability to see spirits. The rest of the film follows similar plot lines of other Asian horror imports (think Dark Water/the Ring).

I did not care for the Reaper/Spirits. They are computer generated garbage. Not scary/not believable. In final analysis this movie scared the crap out of me.