Cinema Vomitus

I cannot stand this movie! I suppose there is a point to it, however I did not see it. I wish I could retrieve the hour and a half spent watching this shit. I've never hated a movie the way I hate this one. Every character is so odd, but in an unappealing way. I'd much rather shoot myself in the foot than watch 'The Virgin Suicides' again.

What a snoozefest! I can't believe this was even made. There is no need for anymore Superman films. We have enough.

What an awful mess. The first five minutes or so actually made me think this was going to be a decent film. I was duped.

I don't get all the hype about this movie. I guess I just wasn't feeling it.

I love Paul Giamatti, but I just couldn't get into this film. It took everything I had to get through it.

"OH, SUGAR!"

Possibly the slowest horror film ever made.

What a pointless movie.

How many times must this shit be done?

It had all the qualities that make for a bad film. Terribly corny story, horrible acting, awful shots, a nice happy ending. If you enjoyed this movie, there is seriously something wrong with you.

I wanted to turn this movie off SOOO bad, but I couldn't find the remote. Sad.

Cillian Murphy's character is just pathetic. One of the most contrived scripts ever written.

I'm sorry, but you don't fuck with a classic!

I'm not gonna lie, I fast-forwarded about 20 minutes of the middle just to get to the end. Still nothing happened! Big waste of time.

I honestly couldn't stop laughing! It was so unbelievably cheesy! What a ghastly film!

Not one of those "so bad it's good" movies. Just plain old bad. And to think it was based on a Stephen King story. Way to ruin a good thing.

Seems like a film I would enjoy, but I was bored to death.

What an odd, odd movie.

Well I'll just come right out and say it. I hate Shakespeare! I don't enjoy anything he has written, or these silly film adaptations.

Oh. My. God. What a boring movie. Was that ending supposed to surprise me? Pah.

There was really no need for this movie. It didn't serve any purpose whatsoever.

This was so hard to sit through. I was completely bored from start to finish.

Chyah! Like this hasn't been done a thousand times...

Wasn't feeling it at all.

Perhaps a larger budget would have made this slightly better, but I really don't think so.

I adored the storyline, but it has to be one of the most boring films ever made. Now, I like slow paced films, but this is just ridiculous! I have limits!

This is simply a mistake. There aren't many decent vampire films.

Why?

I would never actually choose to see this. It was forced upon me. The characters in all these modern horror films are so unbelievable. What a boring story!

I won't be seeing this again. Once is enough, thank you!

It had potential, but the acting is just too horrible for words. Not to mention the story that goes absolutely nowhere.

It had potential, but failed miserably.

I watched this less than a year ago and I can't even remember how it ends. Real good movie, eh?

I really don't know why they bothered.

The very beginning of this movie threw me off. Extremely predictable.

I am sick to death of sports orientated films!

The first 40 minutes or so nearly put me to sleep. Aside from the horrible acting and the corniest script ever written, this movie is just plain boring and it failed to "shock & disturb" me, as promised. It did manage to get a few laughs out of me though.

Bleh. Was this supposed to be a comedy?

I was expecting a bit more.

Am I supposed to be surprised?

It would have been much more effective if it were focused on more of what actually happened, rather than just those two men and their families. I guess most people aren't ready for that just yet.

Didn't really do anything for me.

I'm growing tired of the corrupt cop theme.

I was so bored watching this. My enjoyment of the film lasted about 20 minutes.

I sort of liked it once it was finished, but I found myself on the verge of sleep throughout.

A better cast would have made this film more enjoyable for me. Gary Oldman was great though.

This is just plain weird. Even for me. Now that's saying a lot.

I was a little bored.

I found the premise of this quite interesting, but the way it was approached was just plain wrong! Not to mention the super weak ending! Schumacher does not have a single creative bone in his body! The acting was really painful to sit through. Jim Carrey should steer clear of any more potential "thrillers" in his future career.

This is the prime example of what you watch at four in the morning while you're drifting in and out of consciousness, and cannot find the remote. God-awful acting, paired with a script that is totally unbelievable, and does not contain a single humourous moment. I don't see how this piece of shit was ever passed off as a comedy. You're much better off filing your fingernails to a nice sharp point and clawing at your eyes for an hour and a half than subject yourself to this rubbish. Just a suggestion.

I love almost the entire cast, but I just couldn't get into it. It's your typical cheesy Hollywood blockbuster. That song is the most annoying thing ever! I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

Fuck me! What a goddamn snoozefest! Could this movie possibly move any slower? I thought it was never going to end! It's amazing how slow this felt when all the action sequences were cut so fast. Only Michael Bay could fuck up this bad. He should be shot dead. Simple as that. Granted, the CGI was quite good, but that's not exactly something I look for in a film. Trying to cover up cheesy dialogue, shallow characters and mega plot holes with special effects is a crime against the art of film. If you have any respect for cinema, you will not enjoy yourself. Transformers is easily one of the year's worst films. The pivotal for me had to be when that Megatron lard flicked the little human away with his finger. I have to admit, I did get a good laugh out of that moment. Other than that five second shot, this film is total rubbish. I knew I shouldn't have watched it. Do yourself a favour and leave Transformers on its shelf at the video store. I'm sure kids and those with tiny IQs will be blown away by it though. To each his own.

What a complete waste of my time. I would never have watched this of my own free will.

So basically, I am still not, and nor will I ever be, a Marky Mark fan. Seriously, he should have just stuck with the Funky Bunch, and ride that pony for awhile. But then again, I'm not sure what's worse... Mark Wahlberg acting, or Mark Wahlberg rapping. Perhaps he should have continued making workout videos!

Putting my dislike for Marky Mark aside for a moment, this was still a Hollywood shitfest. However, even I must admit, there were one or two somewhat original scenes. I mean, the girl does kill TWO bad guys! *GASP*

And what the fuck? Did Danny Glover just get dentures or something? His new speech impediment is hilarious! It was definitely the main attraction! Without his speech impediment, this movie would be nothing.

Even though Shooter wasn't the worst film I've ever seen, I would like to first purchase a rifle, then snipe every DVD at Blockbuster from 1000 yards... just to keep with the general theme of the movie, of course.

I have no idea why I subject myself to this rubbish.

Not even Javier could save this steaming pile of horseshit!

Uhm, ew. Definitely one of the worst films I have ever seen! I got suckered into this shitfest because of Bowie, whose role lasted a whopping forty seven seconds. [P.S. Josh Hartnett is so tough with his stick-on tattoos! REBEL!]

Not at all what I expected. It wasn't even remotely cute or entertaining.

This is shit. Anyone who tells you differently is lying to you.