Hall of Shame: The Worst Movies EVAR!


  1. lewiskendell
  2. Lewis

A list of the movies that were by far the most painful to watch that I've ever seen.

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  lewiskendell's Rating My Rating
1
White Noise (2005,  PG-13)
White Noise 0.5 Stars
A complete absence of scary moments (which a horror movie kinda sorta needs) and a nonsensical story combined into a perfect, utter disaster. On a brighter note, it's comforting to know that the worst movie possible has been made, and I've already seen it. It's all uphill from here!
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2
The Devil's Rejects (2005,  R)
The Devil's Rejects 0.5 Stars
Ugh. How could anyone be entertained by this crap? I hated every thing about it , from the universally disgusting characters to the pointless violence.
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3
Ghost Ship (2002,  R)
Ghost Ship 0.5 Stars
I'm not sure if Ghost Ship was an alarmingly bad movie, or a horribly botched abortion. Either way, it was horrifying, unnecessary and I don't approve.
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4
Boogeyman (2005,  PG-13)
Boogeyman 0.5 Stars
I'll admit, I was impressed...with myself. I can't believe I somehow found the fortitude to endure this travesty of a horror movie.
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5
The Super Mario Bros. (1993,  PG)
The Super Mario Bros. 0.5 Stars
Uh, what the hell was that and why did it have the words Mario Bros. in the title?
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6
Hellboy (2004,  PG-13)
Hellboy 1.0 Star
I'm happy to admit that I don't get the appeal of Hellboy. He just looks really...dumb. His origin story in uninteresting, and the movie itself was simply boring.
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7
Mission Impossible 2 (2000,  PG-13)
Mission Impossible 2 1.0 Star
A soulless mishmash of special effects and doves(?). I honestly don't think that I could watch it again.
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8
Darkness (2002,  Unrated)
Darkness 1.0 Star
Boring does not even begin to describe Darkness. Three times, I've attempted to watch the entirety of Darkness. Three times. The results? A brisk walk out of the movie theater after 20 minutes on attempt number one, a pleasant, unplanned nap after 24 minutes during attempt number two, and a quick trip to the garbage can to make a dvd "deposit" after the 30 minute mark on my final try. Netflix, I'm sorry I threw away your dvd, but I truly think that I did you (and the world) a favor.
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9
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997,  PG-13)
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation 1.5 Stars
Who needs an actual story, when you can have random fighters come jumping down from the sky to battle?
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10
Batman & Robin (1997,  PG-13)
Batman & Robin 2.0 Stars
I'm a firm believer that Batman & Robin is intentionally this campy and bad. Otherwise I would be forced to find everyone involved in it's creation and put them safely into mental hospitals.
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11
The Ring Two (2005,  PG-13)
The Ring Two 2.0 Stars
I loved The Ring, so it kills me to have to give The Ring Two such low score. Unfortunately, I have to. It wasn't even slightly scary, the story made little sense, and then they added those ridiculous deer to put the icing on the cake. I like to pretend that The Ring Two never happened.
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  1. sarega
    sarega posted 294 days ago

    Mission Impossible 2, although I didn't hate it as much as you, have you ever seen so much slo-mo used in a 2hr. period? The chief idea I think was to highlight Tom Cruise's hair and it's incredible versitility of movement. And although it's not a horror movie like so many of the others, it does in fact, star Tom Cruise, which is pretty horrible in itself. I think I'd have to add Face/Off (their faces come off, get it? - Clever!) and Swordfish which I couldn't even get through. Good God, if you've never seen it save yourself! As punishment for those two, I think John Revolt-I mean Travolta, should be banned from movies permanently and publish a two page apology in a major newspaper (one for each movie), with special emphasis on the second steaming pile of crap, aka Swordfish.