Zombies & Werewolves & Vampires Oh My!

One of my favorites if not my favorite vampire movie. Actually shows the vampires/werewolves as monsters. No fluffing up the vamps and wolves in this one.

Fantastic special effects and a good back story but not scary in the slightest.

Just a fun little fact about how f'd up Hollywood is. Our lead heroine hottie Ms. Beckinsale was involved and has a child withe the lead actor Michael Sheen (head wolf) at the beginning of filming. By the time it was wrapped, Scott was dumped and divorced and the hottie was married to the director Mr. Wisemen. How jacked up is that?

Holy crap, I forgot there was a Teen Wolf cartoon I used to watch every Saturday morning. Everyone knows this movie. OK next time it is on cable, watch the game at the end...you know the no wolf game for the championship? Where you see just exactly how uncoordinated old Mike J. is...watch #45. He must score 40 pts or more. Even the fat kid gets some. Ok, I have seen the movie a few times...just an interesting tidbit for the rest of you movie dorks out there.

If you have watched and enjoyed the Evil Dead series, Army of Darkness, Briscoe County, Jr., Bubba Ho Tep, or enjoyed the smart ass comedy shown from Cambell in his cameos in the Spiderman movies... This is a movie you won't want to miss.

Another parody movie kind of autobiographical of Bruce Campbell's life as the star of B sci-fi movies. Bruce Campbell plays himself where he gets kidnapped by a redneck town to be a hero and save them from a crazy B type movie villian (a poor man's chinese god of war and protector of bean curd) that the local teenagers distubed at an old graveyard.

With lines such as: "Consider yourself officially exempt from my wrath sweetcakes, and if you're lucky a little later I'll let you play with my boomstick." and playing his typical smartass, cowardly, heroic, jerkoff type character, and with all kinds of inside jokes, this movie will make all Bruce Campbell fans pleased!

Definitely better then the second - Rhona Mitra is not as hot as Beckensale but close. This is a prequel of the whole story of Lucien and the head vamp dickhead's daughter. The whole start of the war. Great special effects. For those of you fools who really like the movies that are nominated for Oscars this year...this movie is not for you.

Pretty dang funny movie. Simon Pegg is genius in most of the flicks I see him in. Nick Frost reminds me of my college roommates. All he needed is a huge mixing bowl filled with frosted flakes and a gallon of milk, eating it with a long handled wooden spoon, sitting in his boxers watching Looney Tunes.

French action film about a killer wolf monster that has Monica Bellucci in it...naked. Should be enough for most people to want to see it. Actually it is one of its only good qualities except for the fight scenes featuring Mark Decascos. If you have ever seen him in a fight scene before you know what you are getting. Story is not bad but some parts are slow. Ok movie 3.5 on the finger scale.

Jim Carrey's breakout film. Dorky vampire movie i loved back when I was 12 when I was always searching Skinemax for the next showing of partial nudity...Jim doesn't have all the goofy overacting facial expressions but still a decent movie if you are in the mood for something very much not serious

Like many others, this was the first zombie movie I had seen. Even back in the day with a tiny budget, it was better than many following movies. Tthis movie set the stage for hundreds of knock offs and video games!

Set for the most part in an old farmhouse, the movie has (you guessed it) THE LIVING DEAD searching for brains to chow on. This is the start of the barricade and the fighting amongst yourselves usually culminating in the cowardly jerkoff getting everyone killed.

Slightly Disturbing movie about and 12-13 year old vampire. All subtitles.

...damn John Carpenter. He made a miserable movie from an absolutely fantastic book by John Steakley. Acting was miserable - James Woods & Daniel Baldwin need to be punched in the yambag and never allowed to act again except maybe a guest appearance on 24 or something. Hopefully a scene which results in decapitation. I dare you to name me one John Carpenter movie that is any good.

READ THIS BOOK by John Steakley - ...damn John Carpenter

They f'd up this series from #1 with James Woods - they all suck unless you like C vamp flicks with no story line

Like all zombie movies you see an excess of gore and violence...and hell, why not? Typical premise with more of a lighthearted approach. More of a Shawn of the Dead type movie meaning it is gory yet fun. JUST a fun movie, short, nothing super fantastic must see, but fun.

The chick who wrote these books is an absolute freaking genius! Definetely not for her average writing skills but for marketing a franchise pointed solely at teenage girls. Getting teenage girls all slobbery about hot super sensitve vampires 100 years old that have a thing for a chick 83 years his junior.

The author plays right into the unrealistic fantasies that women in this day and age all grow up with. I really believe this special kind of crap is what makes women absolutely batsh!t crazy as they get older and realize the fantasy romance crap they see on TV growing up is not very realistic. Why can't you be more like Robert Patterson? Huh, oh, you mean Cedric Diggory? Because I have hair on my ass. Good enough for you ?

Seriously though, has the potential to be better if it had a lot more action, more male type drama (see Underworld) and less kissy face, eyelash fluttery, crap. Movie did actually follow the book for once except that the relationship when from uh, I think he hates me to Full Blown LOVE in..oh 7 min of screen time. If I remember right, that is how it when when I was a teenager as well. And if you thought the movie was boring...NEVER read the book.

Welcome to this years movie most likely to be voted as #1 on the anti-common sense charts. I guess for being made with a budget of $11k it is not a bad movie, but this NEVER would have happened (even if you assume ghosts, demons, etc actually exist).

This movie is like a bad episode of Ghostfacers. I read someone that gave it 5 stars said it was good because it was subtle...huh? Is it possible to suck subtley?

OK - the premise is that these two are experiencing weird crap happening at night while they sleep. Mr. Dun-ta-Da, Here I Come to Save the Day! Tough guy buys a camera to film them while they sleep. As the slow start continues, you learn that the crybaby woe-is-me chick had experienced this in the past yet had never told the BF in the 3 years together or had any psychoanalysis resulting in mass doses of Zoloft.

WARNING Spoilers ahead!

Ok the first couple of days nothing much happens, the door moves a little bit. Some weird noises...whatever. Then your chick sleepwalks, stands there looking at you for 3 hours, things start moving and what do you do besides a little BS research in a comic book? NOTHING.
Do you set up more cameras? NO. Did you get something for personal protection? Not even a baseball bat? NO. Did you even get yourself a freaking flashlight? Hell no.

First thing I would have done? Set up a live webcam streaming to the net in each room. Get a million people to start watching this thing fold out at $5/pop.

How do you not get freaked by your GF standing over you for hours and not get freaked? You don't take her to a shrink right away? You don?t call Ghosthunters or one of those other crappy TV shows when you get the Ouija board spinning around and lighting itself on fire? Hell, William Shatner or Dan Akroyd would have jumped all over that. If you are going to get eaten by a demon or stared at by a freaky GF while you sleep, you may as well get paid for it right? Hell call Buffy and Giles, they would have taken this thing out in a hot minute! Call NBC - they will put Balloon Boy on 24-7 for a week. This wouldn't make people blink.

Finally, the climax. 1:30 minutes in. You get her on film getting dragged down the hall by her foot. You save her. She has some kind of inflamed bite mark. She acts woozy and you don't have her in the car heading to the emergency room? Call an ambulance. NO NO she will be fine. Lets just go back to the bed and go sleepy. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Seriously. People in the audience were laughing and semi-cheering then dead silence at the end.

AHHH - the old Titty Twister Bar and Grill, where men are men and cockroaches are nervous. Where to go with this one...watched this again for the 10th time recently. This is the days of George Clooney's ER days when he was young and wasn't so pompous and self satisfied that he didn't enjoy the smell of his own farts so much. You can tell in his acting. I actually enjoyed his ahole character immensely.

This movie has one of the most memorable, sexy scenes of ALL TIME (thanks Kanye West!). This was my introduction to the goodness that is Salma Hayek naked. Hayek strip teasing while fooling around with the giant Albino python. The whole bar watches while she pours booze down her leg to her toes in Tarentino's mouth. Not very hygenic but who cares! Makes me want to do shooters! Who wouldn't pay $100 dollers a shot for that? I could definetely do without the funk she picked up on her feet from those beautiful Mexican bar tables.

The sun then goes down and all hell breaks loose as Cheech grows fangs and Salma's head turns into a cobra, which is kind of a downer as that does nothing for me... HOWEVER, there is a guy with a cool codpiece that turns into a gun. I imagine any sort of kick would be fairly painful but, well what the hell.

Quinten Tarentino's character is sort of who I imaging QT to be like in real life. Goofy, a little psychotic, and a ass load of wierd...

Does anyone else think Juliette Lewis is creepy? ?? Or is it just me?

Actually a decent movie - even with Josh Harnett in it. One of the better vamp movies I have seen in a while.