Have you ever wondered if director Uwe Boll had a different, better vision for this film and given the opportunity he could make vast improvements? Well, he?s decided to answer this question with the release of a Director?s Cut ? and the answer is no...
In this new DVD version, Boll has cut a few ?boring? parts and added several scenes of action and blood spill. Unfortunately, the film still suffers from a lack of story and laughable dialogue...
For a full DVD review, visit: http://www.popjournalism.ca/magazine/2008/04/08/new-on-dvd-alone-in-the-dark-directors-cut/
I missed the first hour.... in that I taped from the tv & the first hour's taping wasn't good...
A non existent story line? Or at least one that was difficult to find or to follow.
Contrived.
In the game Carnby is alone & meets very few people, in this film there's a whole army.... who kind of mill about with nothing much to do except get beaten/killed by the baddies.
In the game you are detective.... in the film Carnby is a drab character who does'nt have much of a clue about what's going on.
Technically I shouldn't be rating this, as I couldn't sit through the whole thing - and I managed to sit through Epic Movie. Three quaters of the way through I found out something more interesting was on the other channel and turned over. That about sums up how I feel about this film.
What a goddamn mess. There's so much crap to write about this that I woun't even bother. The best scene is when a bomb explodes, leaving the whole screen full of dust. That's how much I liked this waste of time.
I don't think we're supposed to watch this film...
Alright the Movie began really interesting. About American Natives History and stuff. Some great Relicts. But then I had a feeling the story turned in to a Alien Invasion shiit. Sure I paid attention on the Movie, firstly because Slater was great in the Movie. But the Plot could have been better. Oh yeah right it is based upon A Video Game. I really wonder how the Video Game is. I m might try out.
1 Star for Christian Slater s performance. And Great Action Scene on the Street.
1 Star for the Relicsts in the Movie.
Ugh. Is it even worth me revieweing a video game movie by Uwe Boll? I mean really? *sigh* ok lets go through the motions. Slater is utterly terrible as a lead actor. The action sequences are hammy and poorly shot and digitised. Tara reid, although cute, should not be wearing a lab coat unless she's actually a test subject. Horrible plot (gateway to hell under an orphanage anyone?) erratic music, just a terrible terrible movie.
This one is unwatchable, a miracle that I managed to sit through. A story that hardly makes sense, bad camera, bad animations and absolutely horrible acting...
I could tell from the opening credits of The Marine that it was gonna be a long two hours. With Alone In The Dark, I knew ten seconds into the opening crawl.
As expected from Toilet, the action here is lame-o. There is a small glimmer of hope early on when Christian Slater shoots through a block of ice, but alas, it was nothing more than a fluke.
As expected from Toilet, the acting here is lame-o. There is a small glimmer of hope early on with Christan Slater and the cab driver, but alas, it was nothing more than a fluke.
As expected from Toilet, the story here is lame-o. There was no glimmer of hope. I dozed off twice.
There is a brief shootout in the darkness about halfway through the movie (mind you, that's a guesstimation-- at least it felt like it was halfway through) that is reminiscent of Kurt Wimmer. This is the highlight of the film. But that ain't saying much. When it comes to shooting action scenes, Uwe Boll is number one at being number two. He is best when using CG to cover his many, many, many, many, many, shortcomings.
Alone In My Room is slightly better than Bloodrayne, not nearly as doo-doo as In The Name Of The King: A Dung Siege Tale... but still boring as Hell and equally lame.
"Fear is what protects you from the things you don't believe in." (Please note that this quote was only included as an example of the dreadful screenwriting. Each line is as corny as this very quote)
Alright it can be that bad! Alone in the Dark is bluntly a fruitless, steaming pile from Uwe Boll that is hardly watchable, much less memorable.
Usually I can look at a recently produced film and say that it looks good because it's well made, or it might have nice production design; but with this mess I felt that nothing looked good on-screen - quite honestly it's all tremendously ugly! It looks like someone gave an untrained monkey a camera!
Boll is pathetic when he's placed behind a camera, and what's worse is that every person who worked on the movie did an abysmal job. The opening few minutes did nothing to engage me; it's nothing more than stupid violence and unnecessary uses of slo-mo that Boll seems to think "looks cool". The entire duration of the movie keeps becoming more and more painful, stupendous and painful to watch.
Alone in the Dark is basically about a paranormal investigator (Slater) who discovers some strange things that then leads to some creatures getting set loose and many people getting killed.
There are several things that stood out after viewing the film. First of all, the dreadful acting. Christian Slater could not act to save his life. I guess that's what happens when a wooden actor works with a terrible director. But the film's lowest point was casting Tara Reid in the part of a scientist. I don't have any clue why she was even placed anywhere near this film. She does not look anything like a scientist or anyone of any intelligence for that matter.
And I could not believe how shocking the unnecessary sex scene was. It was out of place and put in there just for the sake of a sex scene. Sometimes I wonder not only if Boll has no clue about how to make a movie, but I also wondered if Boll has ever even seen a film.
The directing was appalling, contrived and incompetent. Cinematography was another of the film's low points. Seeing bullets leaving a gun in slow motion is completely unnecessary and used to poor effect. The CGI used in the film for the creatures is AWFUL! The creatures looked bleak, dull and unrealistic. I honestly thought the CGI had to be some kind of joke. One must wonder how Boll got an enormous amount of cash to make the movie and still come up with dreadful CGI and such a steaming pile of horse manure for a movie!
Alone in the Dark is highly stupid, illogical and a complete disgrace to the video game. This film ain't worth your time, so leave it alone and never even consider watching it or you'll probably suffer from post-traumatic stress syndrome for the rest of your life!
To my surprise Uwe Boll made another craptastic film but to my surprise he brought in some familiar faces. Christian Slater plays Edward Carnby who is tasked on finding about these wierd creatures that end up taking over peoples minds or somethin like that.
It has been a good long time since I last watched it but I did know it was a tad bit better then House Of The Dead. It had Tara Reid and Stepehen Dorff who aid along in the battle against these creatures. This film still had bad acting, bad editing and so so visual effects.
The fact that Uwe Boll's name was attached to it surely didn't help sales and it most certainly didn't at all. Alone In The Dark may have been an improvement but not that much of one.
I've never played the game or even seen a screenshot from it, so I wasn't expecting the movie to be like something.
The first impression I got with the movie was that it reminded me of "The Relic"... and believe, it was not a good thing.
The stories are similar... a token of some sort arrives at the museum and there's a monster in the museum. Guy and "smart" girl needs to save themselves from the monster.
There's a big problem with this movie: The plot.
I honestly lost track of things after a while, I had no idea what they were doing or why.
At first, there's a guy who chases another guy (the hero) and he survives 2 gunshots but dies when he is impaled. It's perfectly alright for our hero to kill him and even though several people most likely saw what happened, he is never suspected for murder.
Secondly, there's a predator-alien-relic-monster-thingy in a museum where smart girl i working. It kills people and um... well, it seems to be several monsters at a time... (?????)
I had not idea, sometimes there were monsters, but sometimes people were shooting at each other. WHAT?!
I was also quite shocked at how our hero kills anybody possed by some parasite like it's just childs play, then some military people arrives and everybody starts shooting and killing each other.
I quote some random solider "What the hell is going in here?!"
Then after shooting all those people, it seems like hero and the military guys are friends...
And then there was some orphenage our hero grew up in, then there were some parasites controlling people...
I gave up after an hour, I didn't get the movie at all. There were so many sub-plots and I had no idea who was friends with whom.
Tara Reid was terrible by the way, she should be glad she is so good-lucking or else she would be out of acting-jobs.
The obligatory "we have absolutely no chemistry, but we will have sex anyway"-scene is enough to hate this movie... as if I didn't have enough reasons already.
The games are great, but this movie is pretty bad. It is like The Relic crossed with RBA (Really Bad Acting) syndrome. And I heard a sequel is in the works. The new game on the 360 is gonna rock though.
Thousands of movie scripts are denied each year and some how this movie slipped through. This movie is so far away from the words good movie that its scary. It was so bad that i thought of throwing myself out the window. The only other time that this happened was when i watched Boll's first disaster House of the Dead.
Except for the use of the name of the main character (Edward Carnby) this had nothing, i mean nothing to do with the games. Oh, and it pretty much sucks all the way too.
This is a rather strange movie. It is good in some ways and so horribly wrong in others. At the very end I realized that this is based on a video game which makes a lot of sense. There is one part that everything is black except for gunbursts to kill monsters and it is straight out of a video game. The acting was tolerable even though Slater, Reid and Dorff aren't actually known for world class acting. Watch it if you want something that isn't even based in the realm of possiblity and full of monster blood.
I can't believe it. I did not laugh at this movie at all. I watched this movie having director Uwe Boll's previous movie "House of the Dead" in mind. "House of the Dead" is easy one of the worst movies ever made, and it's so bad that you just have to laugh at it. This movie on the other hand, well, it's still bad, but not THAT bad. It has some really confusing scenes and the plot is so dumb. But this step up for Uwe Boll, but that ain't saying much. Keep in mind that I have never played the videogame so I can't compare it.
It's got hit written all over it, you have to be a fan of the game to understand the godliness this movie has. It's non-stop action from beginning to finish. Cool death metal videos on DVD. It's entertaining and fast paced. In the end you wonder if the world is dead with only two survivors, or about to die!
I actually watched this again, because I didn't remember how bad it was. The story sucks, the characters are uninteresting and the movie itself is just a boring and silly "action" movie.
slater goes further down the barrel, in a crap computer game adaption, orphans are being murfered from a school when all grown up, or something, and something about unferground tunnels, really bad
MCT:July 14, 2008
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MCT:February 14, 2008
MCT:January 7, 2008
