Cobra (1986)

Featured Audience Ratings

• Melvin W

  
  Cobretti: Hey dirtbag, you're a lousy shot. I don't like lousy shots. You wasted a kid... for nothing. Now I think it's time to waste you!  "Crime is the disease. Meet the Cure." What an awful fucking movie this is. Cobra has to be one of the worst 80's… More
  Cobretti: Hey dirtbag, you're a lousy shot. I don't like lousy shots. You wasted a kid... for nothing. Now I think it's time to waste you!  "Crime is the disease. Meet the Cure." What an awful fucking movie this is. Cobra has to be one of the worst 80's action movies I have ever seen. There is nothing about it that I liked or that was in any way good. Everybody involved is horrible. Everyone. I don't hate Sylvester Stallone, but damn his screenplay for this is shit and his acting is not much better. But the worst thing about the movie has to be how cool Stallone and director George P. Cosmatos think it is. You have bad guys clanking axes together, Stallone walking around in aviators with the nickname Cobra. He's tough, he doesn't take shit, he doesn't play by their rules. Oh my God, I hate it. Cobra is a cop who does all the stuff no one else wants to do. He is ruthless and like Harry Callahan, plays by his own rules. He isn't afraid to kill the bad guys. There's a serial killer on the loose going by the very clever name of "Nightslasher." Give me a fucking break. So the whole movie is Stallone acting hardcore. He shoots a lot of people, there are car chases, he fucks a hot girl, and I sat watching, bored and completely irritated at just how bad the movie kept getting. It started bad, but it just kept growing exponentially in awfulness as it went. Another noteworthy element that shows how godawful this is, is that everyone involves believes this movie to be so badass and just oozing in testosterone. Then they play the douchiest 80's songs they could find. That's the kind of music I love to hear from a movie that is all about ruthlessness and brutality.  Do yourself a huge favor and don't watch this. Stallone made many, many bad movies over his career, but from what I've seen this takes the cake.

• Martin S

  
  suprisingly good

• Conner R

  
  I would like to nominate Cobra for being the coolest movie ever made. It seems that every shot was carefully plotted to have the best looking angle and hint of awesome. The color usage is unmatched for the genre. Even without the 80s backdrop it would still be the movie it is. The… More
  I would like to nominate Cobra for being the coolest movie ever made. It seems that every shot was carefully plotted to have the best looking angle and hint of awesome. The color usage is unmatched for the genre. Even without the 80s backdrop it would still be the movie it is. The action sequences rival Mad Max 2 for being 100% innovative, fun and original. The truck scene with Sly in the back firing a machine gun is the epitome of car chase scenes. I love the plot and execution of it, there was a real sense of this different world and set of rules. Only someone like the Night Slasher could be an adversary for The Cobra. Sylvester Stallone gives a flawless and completely and utterly memorable character. Marion Cobretti is the ultimate rough cop that shoots without asking, all he has to do is know they're bad and it's over. Brigitte Nielsen is unbelievably breathtaking as the foreign model Ingrid. Brian Thompson as the Night Slasher is evil in every way imaginable and has some of the best lines as the character. I just can't sing this movies praises enough.

• Tsubaki S

  
  More derivative vigilante propaganda, another boring stone-face performance by Stallone.

• Anthony L

  
  Very silly and very dated, the fact they never made a sequel says a lot! The cool poster promises so much more than you actually get. I didn't expect a masterpiece to be honest but I have been looking forward to seeing this since I was 7 years old! Oh well, I'm sure… More
  Very silly and very dated, the fact they never made a sequel says a lot! The cool poster promises so much more than you actually get. I didn't expect a masterpiece to be honest but I have been looking forward to seeing this since I was 7 years old! Oh well, I'm sure I'll get over it!

• Khris N

  
  The stereotypical 80's action flick.... violence, sex appeal, pop music and Stallone. its not like theres anything really going for it except the cool 80's factor and soundtrack, which was okay. Stallone once again mumbles his way through the movie as hard boiled cop… More
  The stereotypical 80's action flick.... violence, sex appeal, pop music and Stallone. its not like theres anything really going for it except the cool 80's factor and soundtrack, which was okay. Stallone once again mumbles his way through the movie as hard boiled cop Cobra, protecting a witness played by the sexy Brigitte Neilsen who is being hunted by an army of psychos, hell bent on reforming the world order. It was a concept ahead of its time , funnily enough. XD I bet noone even considered psycho gangs going out as serial killers, but then again, we need an army of bad guys to pile up the body count, as thats why Sly does best. ' Anyways, the movie is about coolness and badassness... and Cobra is a bad ass character with flaws. Like advising his partner on being too violent and lowering his sugar levels, to joking that his parents should have named him Alice. But then we have the bad ass look with the match in the mouth, the ivory handled pistol grip with a cobra emblazoned on it, the 1950 Mercury is one helluva car for a kick ass cop, and of course, his sub machine gun with laser sight. and dont forget the usual badass long coat. XD Anyways.... 3 stars for being a true cheesy 80's flick. Its so bad, it was good.

• Jason O

  
  Like most of Stallone's action movies, "Cobra" is an exciting, action packed movie. Sylvester Stallone stars as Cobra, a cop who is well known for tracking down and killing psychopathic killers who are on the loose killing innocent people. While tracking down these… More
  Like most of Stallone's action movies, "Cobra" is an exciting, action packed movie. Sylvester Stallone stars as Cobra, a cop who is well known for tracking down and killing psychopathic killers who are on the loose killing innocent people. While tracking down these serial killers, Cobra is also protecting a woman (Brigitte Nielsen) from danger by carrying her with him. "Cobra" might not be one of the Stallone movies that you hear a lot about such as "Rambo" or "Rocky," but that doesn't mean that i's not a great movie. "Cobra" is full of spectacular driving, fighting, and shooting action sequences while Cobra does his action packed job by showing the criminals that Cobra is as deadly as a cobra. I recommend anybody who likes action movies with tons of exciting action sequences to get "Cobra." It might not get the credit for it, but "Cobra" is one of Sylvester Stallone's best action movies. NOTE: That was my Amazon review from the year 2000. Stallone's indeed awesome, will miss him.

• Tim S

  
  I like the fact that he looked like he was in such good shape but only survived on little slices of pizza.

• Stephen M

  
  As silly a cop thriller as you're likely to see. It's difficult to decide who's the most brainless here: the Police Department, who can't tell the difference between a lone serial killer and a gang of psycho bikers, even when Stallone gets into a car chase with,… More
  As silly a cop thriller as you're likely to see. It's difficult to decide who's the most brainless here: the Police Department, who can't tell the difference between a lone serial killer and a gang of psycho bikers, even when Stallone gets into a car chase with, wait for it, TWO other vehicles; the gang leader, who decides the best way to protect his identity is to make ever more high profile and outrageous attacks on the witness who can identify him; or Stallone's maverick cop, who lets said witness fend for herself at the climax while he goes off wasting gang members. This outdoes most Schwarzenegger movies of the period for appalling one-liners, too.

• xGary X

  
  Marion Cobretti is a cop. A cop who doesn't play by the "rules". A cop who gets results. A cop who dresses like a male stripper. A cop who is clearly in love with his car and probably jerks off over copies of Guns & Ammo. The villains are a collection of killers who… More
  Marion Cobretti is a cop. A cop who doesn't play by the "rules". A cop who gets results. A cop who dresses like a male stripper. A cop who is clearly in love with his car and probably jerks off over copies of Guns & Ammo. The villains are a collection of killers who casually slaughter everyone in their way, conveniently removing any need for a plot or characterisation so a Sly untroubled by thought or conscience can just throw enough ordnance at them to invade the continental USA, while the surrounding traffic spontaneously explode into balls of flame. Brigitte Nielsen (another of cinema's finest acting talents) is also on hand to model a series of crimes against fashion to a horrific AOR rawk ballad, intercut with a montage of gratuitous violence while the bad guy sharpens his weapon. This laughably offensive testosterone-soaked tripe is one of the worst examples of 80s tackiness around, and is so inane and simplistic it could easily be mistaken for a spoof. At least Arnie would've injected a little humour into the proceedings; Stallone just made it a bone-headed ego-trip that makes Rocky IV look positively sophisticated.

• Dean !

  
  One of Stallone's earlier action films. Quite gritty and violent at times as he plays a tough cop out to do thing's his way.

• danny d

  
  stallone kils some people, then he kills some more

• Michael G

  
  I loved this movie when I was in 5th grade. But I loved Bon Jovi then too...

• Dean M

  
  Quite okay of a maverick cop who makes Dirty Harry look talkative goes it alone against a vicious gang.

• Steve K

  
  Total guilty pleasure!

• Paris S

  
  A weird and interesting action flick from the '80s. It's a little unusual; Cobra fuses several different styles together almost as if it was directed by a group of guys as opposed to one. Sometimes Cobra goes all '80s when the environment is muted and period pop plays… More
  A weird and interesting action flick from the '80s. It's a little unusual; Cobra fuses several different styles together almost as if it was directed by a group of guys as opposed to one. Sometimes Cobra goes all '80s when the environment is muted and period pop plays over montage clips, other times its reminiscent of Mad Max with its biker gangs and long chase sequences, the palm trees and barrios have got me thinking Miami Vice... Unfortunately, Cobra doesn't do any of it well. Cobra's characters are all cookie cutter personalities straight out of the action movie handbook. The action is good, not great, but an action movie with paper thin development needs awesome action to compensate. Stallone's charm doesn't save this one. The cover reminds me of Terminator's box art.

• Deb S

  
  "You're da disease.... and I'm da cure." One of my all time favorite movies from the 80s with those "cool" sunglasses, Sylvester Stallone is a one-man assault team complete with a cool car and personalized custom weapons which include a laser-aimed… More
  "You're da disease.... and I'm da cure." One of my all time favorite movies from the 80s with those "cool" sunglasses, Sylvester Stallone is a one-man assault team complete with a cool car and personalized custom weapons which include a laser-aimed submachine gun and a Colt with picture of a cobra on it. Laden with violence and action... Just sit back... and enjoy the ride.

• Nicolas K

  
  Everything you expect from a mediocre Stallone action film.

• Dimitris S

  
  Cosmatos had no idea of how to serve a delicious adventure dish to the public but as time goes by,the public doesn't even notice this...researchers do,and the Luc Besson-Sam Peckinpah combination aesthetic adopted by machismo actors "slash" directors at that time period… More
  Cosmatos had no idea of how to serve a delicious adventure dish to the public but as time goes by,the public doesn't even notice this...researchers do,and the Luc Besson-Sam Peckinpah combination aesthetic adopted by machismo actors "slash" directors at that time period has withered considering the dated galvanized dialogs and plot-lines (evil scumbags shooting everyone because someone forgot to wear them diapers and Cobra teaches them a lesson,woohoo!!!).Sure I love my Predator hunting fun but do I really need to submit myself to another Rambo-influenced torture?

• Jonny C

  
  With a crappy story, some terrible acting, and awful characters, Cobra doesn't seem to have a lot going for it. But you'd be wrong. It has some great action, a super cool car, and Stallone is pretty awesome as the lead.

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