Featured Audience Ratings

• xGary X

  
  A gang of inept, would-be bank robbers have their big score interrupted by a zombie apocalypse that threatens the retirement community that houses their East End grandad and his friends. If there's ever been a film title that perfectly sums up its content, it's Cockneys… More
  A gang of inept, would-be bank robbers have their big score interrupted by a zombie apocalypse that threatens the retirement community that houses their East End grandad and his friends. If there's ever been a film title that perfectly sums up its content, it's Cockneys Versus Zombies! I'm sure it conjures up a Guy Ritchie version of Shaun Of The Dead in your mind's eye, and that's exactly what you get. The effects are surprisingly good considering its obvious budget limitations and there are some suitably gory undead kills as well as a few laughs along the way, although it's more mildly amusing than laugh out loud funny. The premise actually has a lot of potential but the script doesn't really have the imagination to do it justice and the jokes are a little hit and miss, but it does have its moments. Cockneys Versus Zombies is nowhere near as witty or inventive as Shaun, but it's head and shoulders above many of its contemporaries such as Doghouse and the like. Not terrific, but not bad at all either.

• Film C

  
  Don't expect much from this movie and then you may enjoy it! I love Zombies and to introduce them to a cockney great such as Alan Ford what a great premise! theres not much to the Storyline but entertaining enough, its funny and gory i good zombie fest! love the OAP'S!

• Justin F

  
  Think Sean Of The Dead meets Attack The Block and this loosely describes this film. The former has obvious comparisons and it is also essentially a very bloodthirsty black comedy and the latter as it primarily involves feral wide-boy chavs. You will definately need to disengage your… More
  Think Sean Of The Dead meets Attack The Block and this loosely describes this film. The former has obvious comparisons and it is also essentially a very bloodthirsty black comedy and the latter as it primarily involves feral wide-boy chavs. You will definately need to disengage your brain before viewing. Andy and Terry decide to recruit a gang to rob a bank to get money to prevent their grandads retirement home from closing. Its closure will mean he (and the other residents) will have to go "up north somewhere". The thought of this is repulsive to them (as its grim up norf) as grandad proudly declares "ive never been north of Walthamstow dog track in my bleeding life gawd blimey guvor, apples and pears, etc". In the midst of the heist the area is taken over by zombies leaving the Police with more important things to worry about than bank robbers. Having escaped the bank (with hostages) as they were thankfully armed they decide to try to rescue the old biddies at the retirement home. The humour in this film will not to be to everyones taste. For example there is a scene with a baby that whilst I found funny many will be offended by. I think this says more about my sense of humour than the moral majority in all honesty? However, there are some quality scenes. There is a scene with two rival zombie football gangs that really tickled me and a chase scene with an old man using a zimmer frame. Plenty of zombies dying in various creative ways but this is acceptable as they are no longer human so it makes it ok I guess? Of the performances Honor "kinky boots" Blackman and Richard "Ggod life" Briers were especially good and Alan Ford does his Brick Top role from Snatch that he is so good at? The rest of the performances are ok and Michelle Ryan is simply a goddess so there is nothing more to be said?

• Daniel P

  
  In truth it's a bit of a mess in terms of visual style and editing, but Cockneys vs Zombies has a terrific script and one incredibly funny visual gag involving an OAP on a zimmer frame being "chased" by a Zombie.

• Lane Z

  
  Finally, a zombie movie where the actors/characters in the movie actually recognize the baddies for what they really are! ZOMBIES. There's something about the British accents that make these kinds of movies funnier than they most likely are with all the slang terms. It's… More
  Finally, a zombie movie where the actors/characters in the movie actually recognize the baddies for what they really are! ZOMBIES. There's something about the British accents that make these kinds of movies funnier than they most likely are with all the slang terms. It's short, but enjoyable. Not even 90 minutes (just under at about 80), you get right to the action in the opening scene with how the virus breaks out. It's pretty comical how fast everything happens, but this is not a movie hellbent on establishing a huge background on the history of the zombie virus. It just happens, the characters deal with it, and in the end you're left to wonder how it all ends.

• David S

  
  As my friends pointed out if this film had just focused on the youngsters and not included the OAP's then it would have been dreadful. Thankfully Richard Briers and Alan Ford produce some comedy gold with a lot of their scenes. Briers in particular has a great scene trying to… More
  As my friends pointed out if this film had just focused on the youngsters and not included the OAP's then it would have been dreadful. Thankfully Richard Briers and Alan Ford produce some comedy gold with a lot of their scenes. Briers in particular has a great scene trying to escape from a lurching zombes whilst on a zimmer frame ("Zombies! Oh no..."). Ford is similar to his character in 'Snatch' and doesn't hold back on the f-bombs but somehow that just makes the whole thing more hilarious. A lot of the zombie cliches have been seen before and have been done better but at least the characters here seem to have some knowledge of how to deal with the undead and there are some creative (and gory) zombie kills. Plus we have a great zombie baby death! This is no 'Shaun of the Dead' or 'Zombieland' but with a title like this I was expecting much, much worse!

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