Ed Wood Reviews and Ratings



  • November 24, 2009
    This is a film about the real life of low budget director Ed Wood. This of course is directed by Tim Burton. What a perfect choice. And Burton's go to guy Johnny Depp stars as Ed Wood. Plus the film has such a great supporting cast. Martin Landau and Johnny Depp though give the ...( read more)best performances in this. Now the life of Ed Wood is very strange. Not sure how accurate the story is to his life. But it was a interesting. Ed Wood seemed to be a fan of making campy movies. Overall this movie comes off as a comedy since Ed Wood was so strange and funny. Worth checking out for Burton and Depp fans.
  • November 20, 2009
    A great original piece from Tim Burton. It is extremely different from his usual style, but handled with just as much care and passion. Johnny Depp plays a priceless Ed Wood and really makes the character quite sympathetic and naive. It has a great feel to it, as if you're not ev...( read more)en watching a biopic, but something else entirely.
  • November 16, 2009
    Tim Burton's zany comedic biopic is a great film - about (arguably) the worst filmmaker that ever lived. Johnny Depp stars as Edward D. Wood, Jr., a naive aspiring director whose latest stage production has gained a bad review in which only the costumes were given a modicum of pr...( read more)aise. One day, he hears about a Z-grade production house making a thinly-veiled true story about a man that changed his sex. Wood comes back with his first "hit" screenplay - "Glen or Glenda?," and directs himself in the starring role (Wood had a penchant for dressing in womens' clothing). This is much to the chagrin of his aspiring ingenue girlfriend Dolores Fuller (Sarah Jessica Parker), whose about had it with Wood and his growing circle of misfits, perverts (including a low-key brilliant Bill Murray as transsexual-in-the-making Bunny Breckinridge) and freaks (his ensemble cast would soon include Vampira and Tor Johnson, the Swedish wrestler played here by Lisa Marie and George "The Animal" Steele, respectively). Fate soon connects Wood with childhood icon-turned-morphine addict Bela Lugosi (a magnificent, Oscar-winning Martin Landau) and his career is set - the film covers much of the production of films such as "Bride of the Atom" (which became "Bride of the Monster") and "Plan 9 from Outer Space" (funded by the Baptist Church as a fundraiser for their films about the 12 Apostles, it was originally went by a more "offensive title" of "Graverobbers from Outer Space"!). Burton's film, stunningly photographed in stark black and white, is a throwback to the time of Z-grade horror and science-fiction films, and the results are magical. Depp gets deep into the skin of the superficial cineaste Wood, whose aspirations to be an auteur ironically hit a fever pitch when bad director met great director in an inspirational bar conversation with Orson Welles (an uncanny Vincent D'Onofrio). The acceptance Wood never found professionally was even made up for when he met a girl who loved him for him (Patricia Arquette). This is perhaps one of the oddest, funniest and (in its way) weirdly inspiring films about show business ever made. It's also one of the best.
  • November 7, 2009
    Tim Burton's homage to the guy that was considered as the worst filmmaker of his time is an explosive tribute of wonderful uniqueness, stylish sensations and a mirroring of the technical beauties that enhanced the brilliance of a good classic film. Burton goes much more beyond th...( read more)e definition of a spoof. He mocks Ed Wood while mocking himself! An extraordinary contribution to Hollywood's modern filmmaking.

    87/100
  • November 5, 2009
    This film has a great entertaining script and two outstanding performances by Johnny Depp and Martin Landau. The rest of the cast does a fine job as well. I highly recommend this film.
  • November 3, 2009
    Ed Wood es una biopic acerca del que, para muchos, es el peor cineasta de la historia: Edward D. Wood Jr. A diferencia de lo que se podría pensar sobre una película de esta naturaleza, este trabajo germinal de Tim Burton no pretende ser una parodia descarada sobre el direc...( read more)tor de The Bride of the Monster, sino que utiliza el talento de los actores en personajes muy bien elaborados para dar como resultado una comedia fresca y de refinada manufactura.

    El filme se desarrolla en el periodo en que Wood creó sus más célebres "obras maestras" y pone en un papel central la relación del director con Bela Lugosi, el legendario Drácula de Universal Monsters; así como en la afición de Ed Wood por vestir con ropa femenina. El argumento central de la película consiste en la lucha de un ingenuo cineasta admirador de Orson Welles por llegar a ser el mejor director de Hollywood, un sueño que se verá eclipsado por los incesantes fracasos de Wood en todas las películas que, con esfuerzos, logra filmar.

    Con el paso del tiempo, Ed consigue la amistad y el afecto de un grupo de actores, de segunda o en decadencia, y, a pesar de las malas críticas hacia sus películas, se da cuenta que al final del camino su única misión era hacer lo que el creía bueno y llevarlo lo más alto posible. El resultado: Plan 9 from Outer Space.

    Sin duda, Ed Wood cumple su objetivo como una comedia ligera y le permite a la audiencia entrar en contacto con la vida de un cineasta tan histórico como Wood, sin embargo, es importante decir que sufre de los mismos problemas de la mayoría de las películas biográficas al no poder condensar la vida de una persona en un metraje de buen ritmo, esto en cuanto a edición se refiere. Por otro lado, pese a tener un guión (teóricamente) correcto, el clímax no llega en ningún momento y la película no solo se siente incompleta, sino que el argumento termina dependiendo únicamente del trabajo de los actores y del disfrute generado al espectador por una fotografía en blanco y negro creativa y muy acorde con el mood de la serie B.

    Normalmente reconozco el trabajo de Johnny Depp en papeles protagónicos de este tipo, sin embargo, es notoria la falta de fuerza del personaje creado por él para esta película, pues es un personaje con el cual es difícil formar empatía y el cual no tiene una personalidad suficientemente elaborada como para ser el pilar de el filme. Mención aparte merece la actuación de Martín Landau, quien interpreta un personaje secundario en el reparto pero crucial para la trama (Bela Lugosi), una muestra estupenda de un elaboración de un personaje complejo, entretenido y fiel a la naturaleza de la película.

    A pesar de que defectos como estos ponen a Ed Wood por debajo de otras películas de Burton, no limitan la experiencia del espectador ni nos impiden ver la sombra del genio detrás de Edward Scissorhands

    ***1/2
  • November 1, 2009
    a slap on your imagination
  • October 30, 2009
    i gotta say
    this is the best movie ever made with Johnny Depp
    a failed director with a low budget
    who doesn't give up is really great
    martin landau as bela legousi is one of the best performances by a supporting actor
    tim burtons best work
    It's kind of weird that a transves...( read more)tite likes making low budget films but thats what makes ed wood my favorite B-movie director
  • October 29, 2009
    !Comercial or Stupid! :|
  • October 27, 2009
    A loving (if somewhat exaggerated) tribute to one of the absolute masters of grade-z filmmaking. Martin Landau is terrific as Lugosi.
  • October 25, 2009
    Great performance from Depp - totally immersed in the character. Landau is brilliant. Great supporting cast. Its a bit hard to get through at times, but enjoyable none the less.
  • October 15, 2009
    Ed Wood made terrible movies, but he thought he was an artist. This movie explains how. While Ed's movies sucked, Ed Wood is very enjoyable. Martin Landau is great as Bela Lugosi.
  • October 15, 2009
    "I like to dress in woman's clothes. " Just one of the greatest lines from this movie!
  • October 15, 2009
    one of burton best and a wonderful biopic
  • October 11, 2009
    a little weird but still kool
  • October 5, 2009
    Love Johnny Depp...mmm.
  • September 30, 2009
    the begining is so slow i didn't make it through pased the first 30 min
  • September 27, 2009
    Great movie, my favorite is Martin Landau as Bela Lugosi
  • September 24, 2009
    kinda disturbing.. what is most disturbing about the movie is that Ed Wood was really this insane!
  • September 14, 2009
    Contender for Depp's finest performance, transcending Ed Wood Jr's abysmal moviemaking skills with a bottomless enthusiasm for their creation. And for pink argyle sweaters.
  • September 14, 2009
    good stuff... but plan 9 really isn't laughably bad anymore, it's just... sorta bad.
  • September 13, 2009
    This movie is a great biopic about the proclaimed "Worst Director of All-time". It would have been ironic if the movie was bad but it was not. The acting was top notch and the black and white really brings you the audience into the feeling of the 50's. Martin Landau does a brilli...( read more)ant job of portraying the legendary Dracula Bela Lagosi. Johnny Depp does a good job as Ed Wood. The supporting cast was brilliantly casted especially with Bill Murray. This movie takes a look into the man behind the "bad movies" and turns the audience to appreciate that Ed Wood did what he found interesting and unlike a lot of directors today show appreciation for his work even if it is crap.
  • September 12, 2009
    Don't even know what to say except touching, weird, funny, interesting.
  • September 11, 2009
    well done Tim Burton I also really thought Bill Murray was quite humorous
  • September 10, 2009
    A magnificent movie, excellent casts. This here is one of Burton's finest. If you ever love film-making you should really see this first before you even start. Really, this movie is highly recommended to all of yous who wanna make movies. An instant favorite for me.
  • September 9, 2009
    An affectionate tribute to a fellow director unfortunately regarded as the worst in the business. The cast deliver excellent performances, especially the leads, Depp and Landau, in what is Burton's best and most unappreciated film of his career.
  • September 3, 2009




    Photobucket


    It has been estimat
    ...( read more)ed that the opening title/credit sequence cost more (in unadjusted dollars) than the entire budget of any of the real Edward D. Wood Jr.'s films.

  • September 1, 2009
    The team of tim burton and johhny deep are solid, for life,,,
    I love the style of the film, this film is very successful because Burton attempts to reconstruct Ed Wood's life as precisely as possible and Johnny Depp is very convincing in the role of this fascinating man so Burto...( read more)n succeeded in his plan.
  • August 29, 2009
    ed wood is about the worst director of all time, played by johnny depp, who wears women's clothes.
  • August 26, 2009
    Landau is WONDERFUL is this otherwise stupid movie.
  • August 20, 2009
    ed wood, filme sobre a vida do pior diretor de todos os tempos, é mais que um filme. é uma declaração de amor a setima arte.
  • August 16, 2009
    oh yeah, seahorse is in it
  • August 15, 2009
    Brilliant fim. Almost makes me want to be Ed, only without all the angora. Really well made. fantastic acting especially from Landau.
  • August 10, 2009
    In this review I'm going to asess each of the main characters in their own paragraph, I will asess the rating, the directing, sets, costumes, and plot each in their own paragraph. I will title each by what is in it so you can skip what you don't care about and read what you like....( read more)

    Driecting: Tim Burton's classic style, color scheme, actor/actress choices, and look was present and magnificant. The black and white which is present in Sleepy Hollow, Edward Scissorhands, and Sweeney Todd is present in this movie. The choices for cast and the look was classic and perfect Burton. The way he had the characters recact to eachother was awesome and interestingly perfect.


    Costumes: The woman's clothing worn on Depp were interesting, funny, kinda-hot and fun. The costumes used in the 'movies' and on the characters in their real lives were realistic for the year which was 1953-1956.


    Sets: The sets were great. The fake "movie sets" used on Ed Wood's movies were intentionally terrible but in a funny way. The colors used were perfect for the grays they would turn into when the movie was black and white on screen, the colors were great for the blending of the black/white/gray ratios needed.


    Plot: The plot of the movie showed not the entire life but the essence and characteristics of Edward D. Wood Jr. It followed his love with two woman, his friendships with many stars and budding actors. It shows his passion and his quirks. It showed his addiction to transvitisom, and his love of directing. He acted, produced, wrote, and directed movies but they were all terrible. He didn't see that he just saw how much he loved and pursued the goals he wanted. He loved directing so he did. He loved making movies and when he didn't have money he went out there and got the money... no matter how long and how frustrating it was to get it. It showed a man with problems, love, passion, and quirks but overall it was just the life of a man who was blind to what people thought of his movies. Or maybe he wasn't, maybe he just knew he wanted to do it and didn't care if people liked his movies or not. But this movie was inspiring and passionate, it was entertaining and funny, and it was the story of Edward D. Wood Jr.


    Rating: The reason this movie is rated R is because of Language. The language in this movie isn't terrible but it does have at least six f-words, and the usual shit and damns that most movies have. The language is the main reason but there is also some sexual content (very little) including a sexual dance in which Johnny Depp dresses as a woman stripper and does a strip tease ending with him wearing a striper bikini.


    Quotes:
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I met Bela Lugosi.
    Dolores Fuller: Why, I thought he was dead.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, he's very much alive. Well, sort of.

    [Bela Lugosi casts a love spell on Vampira who is on TV while moving his fingers like Dracula]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: My Gosh, Bela, how do you do that?
    Bela Lugosi: You must be double-jointed. And you must be Hungarian.

    [Bela Lugosi answers the door on Halloween night wearing his Dracula costume]
    Children: Trick or treat!
    [At the sight of Dracula, all but one little boy scream and run away]
    Bela Lugosi: Aren't you scared, little boy? I'm going to drink your blood!
    Little boy: You're not a real vampire. Those teeth don't frighten me.
    [Bela looks puzzled. Ed Wood appears next to him in the doorway]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: How 'bout these?
    [Pulls out his entire row of front teeth]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [Little boy screams and runs away]
    Bela Lugosi: Hey... How d'you do that?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Dentures!
    [Holds them up]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Lost my pearlies in the war!

    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: My girlfriend still doesn't know why her sweaters are always stretched out.

    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Listen, I was wondering if you'd like to go out sometime, grab some dinner, maybe?
    Vampira: You mean a date? I thought you were a f*g.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, no, I'm just a transvestite.

    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I like to dress in women's clothing.
    Georgie Weiss: You're a fruit?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, not at all. I love women. Wearing their clothes makes me feel closer to them.
    Georgie Weiss: You're not a fruit?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, I'm all man. I even fought in W.W.2. Of course, I was wearing women's undergarments under my uniform.


    Tagline: Movies were his passion. Woman were his inspiration. Angora sweaters were his weakness.


    Johnny Depp: Johnny Depp is always amazing to me but I will try to be cynical as a movie reviewer for this review so you can know how actually magnificant he is even to a non-depp lover. Depp put a hysterical twist on the worst director to ever live with quirky remark smiles and a odd but fun voice. The transvestite twist on the character would stop most actors in their tracks but Depp not only does it well and belivably but with a smile and a spring-in his step. He makes it seem natural, and only a qualified and marvelous actor could do that. Tim Burton always picks Depp for the perfect part.


    Sarah Jessica Parker: Even though her character was kinda bi**hy her acting was superb. I'm not normally a Sarah Jessica Parker fan but she was good as Dolores Fuller. She isn't as weird and abnormal as the other characters so she was normally upset or annoyed with what they were doing or how they were acting... so her character wasn't as entertaining to watch but the way she performed was great.


    Martin Landau: He was a wonderful Bela Lugosi. I have never seen a Bela Lugosi movie so i can't say he was acurate but I sure had a fun time watching him. He had a great essance and air about him. The was he walked, talked, acted, and stood all were eerie, creepy, and old timey scarey. I can see how he was casted to play Lugosi. Landau was funny and had some pretty great friendship-style-chemistry with Depp. They looked so comfortable together like old friends meeting eachother again.


    Bill Murray: He played an interesting and fun character named Bunny Breckinridge. His character was gay, and wanted to have a sexchange and become female so he could marry his boyfriend. It was a random and weird character but he was funny and kind-spirited. He always had a sarcastic remark or funny pun to lighten the room. His essence was light and feathery, he was amazing and hilarious.

    advertisementEdward D. Wood, Jr.: I met Bela Lugosi.
    Dolores Fuller: Why, I thought he was dead.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, he's very much alive. Well, sort of.

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    Bela Lugosi: The women... The women prefer the traditional monsters.

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    [Bela Lugosi casts a love spell on Vampira who is on TV while moving his fingers like Dracula]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: My Gosh, Bela, how do you do that?
    Bela Lugosi: You must be double-jointed. And you must be Hungarian.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Boy, Mr. Lugosi, you must lead such an exciting life! When is your next picture coming out?
    Bela Lugosi: I have no next picture.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: You gotta be joking, a great star like you? You must have dozens of them lined up!
    Bela Lugosi: Back in the old days, yes... Now, no one gives two fucks for Bela.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: But you're a big star!
    Bela Lugosi: No more. I haven't worked in four years. This business, this town, it chews you up, then spits you out.
    [pauses]
    Bela Lugosi: I'm just an ex-boogeyman.

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    Bela Lugosi: They don't want the classic horror films anymore. Today it's all giant bugs. Giant spiders, giant grasshoppers... Who will believe such nonsense?

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    [Bela Lugosi answers the door on Halloween night wearing his Dracula costume]
    Children: Trick or treat!
    [At the sight of Dracula, all but one little boy scream and run away]
    Bela Lugosi: Aren't you scared, little boy? I'm going to drink your blood!
    Little boy: You're not a real vampire. Those teeth don't frighten me.
    [Bela looks puzzled. Ed Wood appears next to him in the doorway]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: How 'bout these?
    [Pulls out his entire row of front teeth]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [Little boy screams and runs away]
    Bela Lugosi: Hey... How d'you do that?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Dentures!
    [Holds them up]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Lost my pearlies in the war!

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    Georgie Weiss: Why would Lugosi wanna do a sex-change flick?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Because he's my friend!

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    [On the phone, agitated]
    Georgie Weiss: Look, look, look, when I said that you could have the western territories, I didn't mean all 11 states! I meant California, Oregon, and, uh, what's that one on top...
    [Looks at map]
    Georgie Weiss: Washington! Yeah, yeah. Oh, really? Well, *screw you*!
    [to Ed Wood, indifferently]
    Georgie Weiss: Hi, can I help ya?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes, I'm Ed Wood, I'm here about directing the Christine Jorgensen picture.
    Georgie Weiss: Well, a couple of things have changed. It ain't gonna be the Christine Jorgensen story no more. Goddamn Variety had to print the story before I got the rights. Now that bitch is asking for the sky.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Aw, you're not gonna make the movie...
    Georgie Weiss: No! 'Course I'm gonna make the picture! I already presold Alabama and Oklahoma. Those repressed Okies, they go for that twisted, perverted stuff. We'll just do it without the she-male. We'll fictionalize it.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Is there a script?
    Georgie Weiss: Fuck no! But, there's a poster!
    [Holds up poster that reads "I Changed My Sex"]
    Georgie Weiss: It opens in 9 weeks in Tulsa.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: My girlfriend still doesn't know why her sweaters are always stretched out.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: This story's gonna grab people. It's about this guy, he's crazy about this girl, but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn, Georgie. This is drama.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Listen, I was wondering if you'd like to go out sometime, grab some dinner, maybe?
    Vampira: You mean a date? I thought you were a fag.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, no, I'm just a transvestite.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I like to dress in women's clothing.
    Georgie Weiss: You're a fruit?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, not at all. I love women. Wearing their clothes makes me feel closer to them.
    Georgie Weiss: You're not a fruit?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, I'm all man. I even fought in W.W.2. Of course, I was wearing women's undergarments under my uniform.

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    Criswell: Eddie, we're in show biz. It's all about razzle-dazzle. Appearances. If you look good, and you talk well, people will swallow anything.

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    Dolores Fuller: Ed, what's *my* motivation?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: You're the file clerk. You're running into the next room and you run into Janet.
    Dolores Fuller: But are we good friends or is she just a casual acquaintance?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Dolores, I have five days to complete this picture. Don't get goofy on me.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: We don't have a permit. Run!

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    [Stepping into water]
    Bela Lugosi: GODDAMN, it's cold!
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: It'll warm up once you're in it.
    Bela Lugosi: FUCK YOU! You come out here!

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    Bela Lugosi: I refuse to drive in this country. Too many madmen.

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    Bela Lugosi: This is the most uncomfortable coffin I've ever been in. You are wasting my time.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: And cut! Print. We're moving on. That was perfect.
    Ed Reynolds: Perfect? Mr. Wood, do you know anything about the art of film production?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Well, I like to think so.
    Ed Reynolds: That cardboard headstone tipped over. This graveyard is obviously phony.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Nobody will ever notice that. Filmmaking is not about the tiny details. It's about the big picture.
    Ed Reynolds: The big picture?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes.
    Ed Reynolds: Then how 'bout when the policemen arrived in daylight, but now it's suddenly night?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What do you know? Haven't you heard of suspension of disbelief?

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    [repeated line]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Cut! That was perfect!

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [after Thor Johnson bumps into a scenery wall while walking through a door making the wall shudder] Ok, and CUT! PERFECT! PRINT IT!
    Cameraman Bill: Don't you wanna do another take Ed? Seems like big baldy had some problems gettin' through that door.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, it's fine. It's real. You know, in actuality, Lobo would have to struggle with this problem every day.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Why if I had half a chance, I could make an entire movie using this stock footage. The story opens on these mysterious explosions. Nobody knows what's causing them, but it's upsetting all the buffalo. So, the military are called in to solve the mystery.
    Editor on Studio Lot: You forgot the octopus.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, no, I'm saving that for my big underwater climax.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Why if I had half a chance, I could make an entire movie using this stock footage. The story opens on these mysterious explosions. Nobody knows what's causing them, but it's upsetting all the buffalo. So, the military are called in to solve the mystery.
    Old Crusty Man: You forgot the octopus.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, no, I'm saving that for my big underwater climax.

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    Orson Welles: Visions are worth fighting for. Why spend your life making someone else's dreams?

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    Georgie Weiss: So, what was the important news you couldn't tell me on the phone, again?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Well, I started thinking about what you were saying about how your movies need to make a profit. Now, what is the one thing, if you put it in a movie, it'll be successful?
    Georgie Weiss: Tits.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, better than that. A star.
    Georgie Weiss: you must have me confused with David Selznick. I don't make major motion pictures; I make crap.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes, but if you take that crap and put a star in it, then you've got something.
    Georgie Weiss: Yeah. Crap with a star.

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    [while he and the others flee the chaotic premiere of "Bride of the Monster" in a cab]
    Bela Lugosi: Now that was a premiere.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Do you know that I've even had producers re-cut my movies?
    Orson Welles: I hate when that happens.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: And they always want to cast their buddies. It doesn't even matter if they're right for the part.
    Orson Welles: Tell me about it. I'm supposed to do a thriller for Universal. They want Charlton Heston as a Mexican.

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    Bunny Breckinridge: What about glitter? When I was a headliner in Paris, audiences always liked it when I sparkled.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No!
    Bunny Breckinridge: Cat's Eyes.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No!
    Bunny Breckinridge: Well, I'm going to need some antennae.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No! You're the ruler of the galaxy! Show a little taste!

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [Reading a review] Look, he's got some nice things to say here. "The soldiers' costumes are very realistic." That's positive!
    Bunny Breckinridge: Rave of the century.

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    [Bunny Breckenridge is being baptized]
    Reverend Lemon: Welcome to the fold, brother. Welcome. Praise the lord, brother. Do you reject Satan and all his evils?
    Bunny Breckinridge: Sure.
    [after his baptism, Bunny swims towards Ed Wood]
    Bunny Breckinridge: How do you do it? How do you get all your friends to get baptized just so you can make a monster movie?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: It's not a monster movie. It's a supernatural thriller.

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    [on the phone to Bunny]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Listen, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites. I need transvestites. All right. Bye.
    Bela Lugosi: Eddie, what kind of a movie is this?

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [on phone with Mr. Feldman] Really? Worst film you ever saw. Well, my next one will be better. Hello. Hello.

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    Kathy O'Hara: Eddie's the only fella in town who doesn't pass judgment on people.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: That's right. If I did, I wouldn't have any friends.

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    Bela Lugosi: Karloff? Sidekick? FUCK YOU! Karloff did not deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in Hell for all I care!
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What happened?
    Bela Lugosi: How dare that asshole bring up Karloff? You think it takes talent to do Frankenstein? It's all makeup and grunting.
    [Mocks Frankenstein]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Bela, I agree with you 100%. Now, "Dracula," that's a role that requires talent.
    Bela Lugosi: Of course. Dracula requires presence. It's all in the eyes, and the voice, and the hands...
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [interrupting] That's right. That's right. You seem a little agitated. You wanna to go outside and get some air?
    Bela Lugosi: Bullshit! I'm ready now! Roll the camera!

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: You know, you're, you're much scarier in real life than you are in the movie.
    Bela Lugosi: Thank you.

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    Criswell: Can your heart stand the shocking facts of the true story of Edward D. Wood Jr.?

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    [Impersonating Bela Lugosi]
    Dr. Tom Mason: I want to suck your blood. I want to suck your blood!
    Bunny Breckinridge: Let's hear you call Boris Karloff a cocksucker.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Is there a script?
    Georgie Weiss: Fuck no. But, there's a poster.

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    [Waiting to be baptized in a swimming pool]
    Vampira: Why couldn't we do this in the church?
    Criswell: Because Brother Tor couldn't fit in the sacred tub.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Mr. Reynolds.
    Ed Reynolds: Yes.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: We are going to finsh this picture just the way I want it... because you cannot compromise an artist's vision.
    Reverend Lemon: But it's OUR money.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: And you're gonna make a bundle, but only if you shut up and let me do things my way.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Is something wrong, Bela?

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: ...and then, Dr. Vornoff falls into the pit, and his own octupus attacks and eats him. The end.
    Old Man McCoy: Whew! That's quite a story.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes.
    Old Man McCoy: So, uh, you made the movie, and now you wanna make it again?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No. We shot ten minutes of the movie, and now we're looking for completion funds.
    Old Man McCoy: Oh, son, you're too vague.
    [Yells to one of his butchers]
    Old Man McCoy: BILLY BOB! You're cuttin' em too lean.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Mr. McCoy. How can I make you happy?
    Old Man McCoy: [Spits] Okay. Two things. Number one: I want the movie to end with a big explosion. Sky full of smoke.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes. But it ends with Dr. Vornoff falling into the pit.
    Old Man McCoy: Not any more. Number two: I got a son. Little slow, but a good boy, and somethin' tells me he'd make a helluva leadin' man.

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    Bela Lugosi: Pull the string! Pull the string!

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    [pointing to a "Jacob's Ladder" on the set of Bride of the Atom]
    Bela Lugosi: I'm not getting near that goddamn thing. One of them burned me in "The Return of Chandu".

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    [At the "Plan 9" premiere]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: This is the one. 'This' is the one I'll be remembered for.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: They're driving me CRAZY. These Baptists are stupid. Stupid. STUPID.

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    [on the reason for the success of 'Dracula(1931)']
    Bela Lugosi: They were mythic. They had a poetry to them.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes.
    Bela Lugosi: And you know what else? The women... the women preferred the traditional monsters.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: The women? Huh?
    Bela Lugosi: The pure horror, it both repels, and attracts them, because in their collective unconsiousness, they have the agony of childbirth. The blood. The blood is horror.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: You know, I never thought of that.
    Bela Lugosi: Take my word for it. If you want to make out with a young lady, take her to see "Dracula".

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What are you drinking, Bela?
    Bela Lugosi: Formaldehyde
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Straight up or on the rocks?

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Kathy... I'm about to tell you something that I never told any girl on a first date. But I think it's important that you know... I like to wear women's clothes.
    Kathy O'Hara: Huh?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I like to wear women's clothes. Panties, brassieres, sweaters, pumps. It's just something I do. And I can't believe I'm telling you this, but I really like you, and I don't want it getting in the way down the road.
    Kathy O'Hara: Does this mean... you don't like sex with girls?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: No, I love sex with girls.
    [long pause]
    Kathy O'Hara: Okay.

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    [making up the bald Dr. Tom to look like Bela Lugosi]
    Makeup Man Harry: Ed, what am I gonna do here.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What do you mean?
    Makeup Man Harry: He has no hair.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Gee, I never noticed that. Put a wig on him!

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    Vampira: You're watching our Halloween movie, "White Zombie", starring Bela Lugosi, John Harron, Madge Bellamy, and a bunch of other people I've never heard of.

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    Dolores Fuller: You people are insane! You're wasting your lives making shit! Nobody cares! These movies are terrible!

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    Bunny Breckinridge: Oh, what does that old queen know?

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Are you people insane? I'm the director. I make the casting decisions around here.

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    [Finds Bela ailing]
    Bela Lugosi: This happens all the time.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Is there anything I can get for you? Water or a blanket?
    Bela Lugosi: Goulash.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I don't know how to make goulash.
    [See the track marks on Bela's arm]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Bela, what's in the needle?
    Bela Lugosi: Morphine. With a demerol chaser.

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    [Bride of the Monster wrap party. Mariachi band plays "Que sera sera"]
    Tor Johnson: Mister Bunny, what's wrong? I heard you were becoming a lady.
    Bunny Breckinridge: Oh, that. Mexico was... a nightmare. We got into a car accident... he was killed. Our luggage... was stolen. The surgeon... turned out to be... a quack. If it hadn't been for these men...
    [gestures to the Mariachi band]
    Bunny Breckinridge: I don't know... how I would have... survived,

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    Dolores Fuller: [arriving for her scenes in "Bride of the Monster"] Well, I see the usual cast of misfits and dope addicts are here.

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    Bela Lugosi: [watching Vampira on TV] I think she's a honey. Look at those jugs.

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    [Ed is cross-dressed on the set of "Glen or Glenda"]
    Dolores Fuller: How can you just walk wound like that in front of all these people?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Well hon, nobody's bothered but you. Look around.
    Dolores Fuller: Ed, this isn't the real world. You've surrounded yourself with a bunch of WEIRDOS!
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Oh say it a little louder, I don't think Bela heard you!

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    [Bela, in his Dracula costume, hears the doorbell on Halloween night]
    Bela Lugosi: Children! I love children.

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: It's a guaranteed blockbuster.
    Ed Reynolds: Hmm. Ah, I understand this science fiction is popular, but uh, don't the big hits always have big stars?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Well we have a big star: Bela Lugosi.
    Ed Reynolds: Bela Lugosi? Why, I though he passed on.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Yes. Yes he did. But...
    [produces tiny spool of film]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I've got the last footage he ever shot.
    Ed Reynolds: Well, it doesn't look like very much.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Mr. Reynolds, this is the acorn that will grow a great oak! I'll just get a double to finish his scenes, and we'll release it as "Bela Lugosi's Final Film"!

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [talking on phone] Bunny? We're making another movie! Yes. I got the Baptist Church of Beverly Hills to put up the cash!
    Paul Marco: [knocking on door] Ed, I got the Lugosi doubles outside!
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Bunny, I gotta go...
    [Ed opens the door to find a short man, a fat man, and a Chinese man]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [sighs, shakes head] He's too short, he's too... tall, he's... just not going to work.
    Paul Marco: Well, Ed. I was thinking like when Bela played Fu Manchu...
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [Pulls Paul aside]
    [wispering]
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Paul, that was Karloff.

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    [watching Tor Johnsson at his wrestling match]
    Bunny Breckinridge: Guess where I'm going next week.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I don't know. Where?
    Bunny Breckinridge: Mexico. Guess what I'm doing when I get there.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I don't know. Lie on a beach.
    Bunny Breckinridge: Wrong. I'm getting my first series of hormone injections. And when thos girls kick in, they're going to take out my organs, and make me a woman.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Are you serious?
    Bunny Breckinridge: It's something I've wanted to do for a long time. But it wasn't until I saw your movie that I realized: I have to take action! GOODBYE PENIS!
    Dolores Fuller: [obviously annoyed] Could you please keep it down?

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    Bela Lugosi: [about to start filming at night] "All right, lets shoot this fucker!"

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    Nurse: Oh my goodness, you gave me the willies! You look like that Dracula guy.
    Bela Lugosi: My name is Bela Lugosi... and I wish to commit myself.
    Nurse: For what reason?
    Bela Lugosi: I have been a drug addict for twenty years. I NEED HELP!

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I'm a movie director.
    Tor Johnson: Movies? You mean like the Mickey Mouse?

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    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Say, let's get married.
    Kathy O'Hara: Huh?
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Right now. Let's go to Vegas.
    Kathy O'Hara: But, Eddie, it's pouring and the car top is stuck.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Phooey. It's only a five hour drive and it'll probably stop by the time we get to the desert. Heck, it'll probably stop by the time we get around the corner. Let's go.

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    Photographer #1: Who's crazy idea was it to bury him in the cape?
    Photographer #2: I heard it was Ed Wood. It was how he wanted to be remembered.

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    Reverend Lemon: [sees Ed come out in drag] Mr. Wood, what do you think you're doing!
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: I'm directing.
    Ed Reynolds: Not like *that* you're not.
    Reverend Lemon: Remove that getup immediately. You shame our lord.

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    Ed Reynolds: Before we start shooting, Mr. Wood, we have a few questions.
    Reverend Lemon: Yes. The script contains numerous references to graverobbing. Now we find the concept of digging up consecrated ground to be highly offensive. It is blasphemy.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What are you talking about, it's the premise of the movie. It's the title of the movie for Christ sakes.
    Reverend Lemon: But Mr. Wood!
    Ed Reynolds: Yes, about that title. It strikes us as very inflammatory. Why don't we change it to Plan 9 from Outer Space.
    Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Huh. That's ridiculous.

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    Waiter: Hi, would you like some water?
    Loretta King: No. No water. No liquids! I'm terribly allergic to them.

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    Bela Lugosi: Home? I have no home. Haunted... despised... living like an animal. The jungle is my home! But I will show the world that I can be its master. I shall perfect my own race of people... a race of atomic supermen that will conquer the world!
  • August 6, 2009
    Great filmization of a strange topic. Terrific cast and I love the follow-ups at the end.
  • August 2, 2009
    People might have thought this was terrible film but for me I thought it was really funny.
  • July 30, 2009
    In the second of their great collaborations, Tim Burton and Johnny Depp, in the process of telling the story of the world's worst filmmaker, manage to elevate him to heroic status by exploring his world of misfits and low-budget magic.
  • July 28, 2009
    lol. Odd movie......
  • July 26, 2009
    Only watched half of it, it was rather boring. Sorry Johnny.
  • July 15, 2009
    Ed Wood is a movie that is creepy, clever, hilarious, touching, and entertaining all at the same time. Brilliant.
  • July 14, 2009
    weird but quite good
  • July 14, 2009
    I think I saw this once...
  • July 13, 2009
    One of the best Tim Burton films.
  • July 13, 2009
    this was good, twisted but good
  • July 9, 2009
    as always I like Johnny Depp performances.

Summary


Ed Wood Summary