Stan Helsing (2009)

18% of critics liked it
(17 reviews)
16% of users liked it
(5,001 ratings)

A descendant of the legendary vampire slayer who did battle with the most infamous bloodsucker in history faces off against six of the most frightening monsters of the modern era in this rowdy horror comedy featuring Kenan Thompson and Leslie Nielsen. The closest that video-store clerk Stan Helsing… More A descendant of the legendary vampire slayer who did battle with the most infamous bloodsucker in history faces off against six of the most frightening monsters of the modern era in this rowdy horror comedy featuring Kenan Thompson and Leslie Nielsen. The closest that video-store clerk Stan Helsing (Steve Howey) ever came to fending off monsters was dealing with disgruntled customers irked at the lack of new releases -- but with Halloween fast approaching, that's all about to change. When the spookiest night of the year rolls around and Stan gets stranded in Stormy Night Estates with a group of his best friends, his true destiny is finally revealed. Stan Helsing shares the same bloodline as Dr. Abraham Van Helsing, the very man who once defeated Count Dracula. When Freddy, Jason, Chucky, Pinhead, Michael Myers, and Leatherface come out to play, Stan becomes convinced that he has the knowledge and know-how to defeat the dreaded horror icons. Perhaps with the help of Teddy (Thompson) and the rest of his longtime pals, Stan can uphold the family tradition of battling baddies and pass the torch to the next generation. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi

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Rating, Runtime: R, 1 hr. 30 min.
Directed By: Bo Zenga
Written By: Bo Zenga
Genres: Horror, Comedy

In Theaters: Oct 23, 2009 Wide
On DVD: Oct 27, 2009
Studio: Anchor Bay Entertainment

Critic Reviews

Robert Abele, Los Angeles Times
Like garlic, holy water and silver bullets for our mythic evildoers, Stan Helsing is a surefire repellent to any good time.
John Anderson, Variety
If Stan does nothing else, it should at least get its four leads some attention.
Frank Scheck, Hollywood Reporter
If there's one thing of which the cinematic world doesn't need more, it's horror movie spoofs.
Rick Groen, Globe and Mail
How do you make fun of boredom without being boring? Well, that's a tall task requiring lots of smarts and even more artistry.
Jeannette Catsoulis, New York Times
By the time we reach the climactic karaoke smackdown, we have learned more about Freddy Kruegerâ(TM)s personal hygiene challenges -- and how to make a shockingly bad movie -- than we ever wanted to know.
Kyle Smith, New York Post
Mostly the gags are unfortunate and amateurish, but this micro-budget flick at least has a semi-coherent plot and every 10 minutes or so there's a flash of wit.
Wesley Lovell, Oscar Guy
A darkly humorous horror comedy that fails to re-ignite the spark that made Scary Movie so much fun.
Felix Vasquez Jr., Cinema Crazed
[Director] Zenga really seems to be enamored with the genre he's satirizing embedding these gags in to the scripts instead of just tossing them at us waiting for us to laugh...
Steve "Uncle Creepy" Barton, Dread Central
Its target audience is without question people who are just looking for a mindless good time and horny teenagers who find fart jokes to be the epitome of humor.
Brian Orndorf, DVDTalk.com
At least the Scary Movie features had a budget and filmmakers with some genre battle scars. Stan Helsing is more Friedberg/Seltzer territory: random, agonizingly desperate, and dripping with laziness.
Brent Simon, Shared Darkness
Puerile, yes, but rooted sincerely in character, this well cast comedy lampoons contemporary film audiences' familiarity with the horror genre without ever stooping to senselessly overloaded referential gags.
Jim Slotek, Jam! Movies
How low can the genre-spoof genre go?
Rob Humanick, Slant Magazine
This might be the cheapest-looking production of the year.
Steve Ramos, Boxoffice Magazine
To its credit, Stan Helsing is no less funny than the studio comedy Couples Retreat, meaning that even marquee comedians like Vince Vaughn couldn't save this film.
Prairie Miller, NewsBlaze
Concocting a Halloween season brew of grossout and gentle gore, Stan Helsing doesn't let its derivative horror get in the way of over the top humor served up spicy and raw.
Ernest Hardy, L.A. Weekly
The generically attractive young cast gamely tries to pump life into the script, to no avail.

Read all 16 critic reviews

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Fresh (60% or more critics rated the movie positively)

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Featured Audience Ratings

John M

ive always hated these kinds of movies. . but i suffered thru just because i was curious. I suppose it could have been far worse :)
Spencer S

Any redeeming quality I tried to find in this was found wanting. Not only does this movie never once make true sense, but it rips off from all the low budget, grunge fests that have been produced in the last ten years with introductions from American Pie, National Lampoon, and the… More
Any redeeming quality I tried to find in this was found wanting. Not only does this movie never once make true sense, but it rips off from all the low budget, grunge fests that have been produced in the last ten years with introductions from American Pie, National Lampoon, and the Scary Movie films. Stan Helsing is a parody, that really parodies nothing. It isn't all too funny, though the movie features a hilarious cameo by legend Leslie Nielsen. Besides the women in the film being almost naked with a laughable explanation, and the distinct stupidity of parodies, the characters only possessed substance in the beginning of the film before swiftly shifting to all out chaos and dumbassery. Watch Nielsen on YouTube; otherwise, avoid this like the plague.
Dead A

Lame. I expected better from Kenan Thompson.
Corey W

Oh, dear....
Luke B

Oh dear Christ almighty! Van Helsing was pretty much a spasticated spoof as it was. Stan Helsing is a dedicated cluster fuck of comedic incompetence. If the idea of Michael Myers (now called Mikey) wearing a yarmulke makes you laugh then a) you're a fucking idiot that should have… More
Oh dear Christ almighty! Van Helsing was pretty much a spasticated spoof as it was. Stan Helsing is a dedicated cluster fuck of comedic incompetence. If the idea of Michael Myers (now called Mikey) wearing a yarmulke makes you laugh then a) you're a fucking idiot that should have been aborted and b) you might like this shit. The only reason to keep watching this is Diora Baird, literally couldn't take my eyes off her. The only 'joke' worth commenting on is the Michael Jackson pisstake. This shows that somewhere lay some comical balls of steel, or they stupidly forgot to edit it out. Probably the latter.
Deb S

Plot: Stan, along with his best friend, his best friend's date, and a smoking hot ex-girlfriend are off to a costume party, when Stan convinces them to take a side trip to Stormy Night Estates to drop off some videos. Along the way they meet some really creepy characters (along… More
Plot: Stan, along with his best friend, his best friend's date, and a smoking hot ex-girlfriend are off to a costume party, when Stan convinces them to take a side trip to Stormy Night Estates to drop off some videos. Along the way they meet some really creepy characters (along the likes of Freddy Krueger, Pinhead, Chucky, Jason Voorheas, Leatherface and Michael Myers). Stan finds out that he is the heir to the famous monster hunter, Abraham Van Helsing and must now stop these horror icons before they take over the town and kill all the people of the town. Look out for a cameo appearance of Leslie Nielsen as a transvestite barman in a redneck karaoke bar. This was an unapologetic parody of horror flicks including 'A Nightmare On Elm Street', 'Friday The 13th', 'Jeepers Creepers', 'Child's Play,' 'The Last House on the Left' and 'Hellraiser.'
Chad R

I actually kind of enjoyed this parody of horror movies. Mixes together a variety of different old horror flick plots and tries to make it funny with varying results...maybe it was just the two hot eye candy chicks in slutty halloween costumes that kept me watching until the end...
Doctor S

Pretty funny premise with many in-joke horror movie references ("Take Elm Street, the party's at the last house on the left.") undone by the basic stupidity of the proceedings. There was potential with a proper script but what wound up onscreen feels like a first… More
Pretty funny premise with many in-joke horror movie references ("Take Elm Street, the party's at the last house on the left.") undone by the basic stupidity of the proceedings. There was potential with a proper script but what wound up onscreen feels like a first draft. So we have a horror comedy that is only briefly funny and not at all scary. However an extra half-star for the likable cast and the presence of Leslie "No Joke Is Too Corny" Nielsen.
Ivan D

A great premise for a great parody, but instantly went downhill as it recycled jokes from the movies with "movie" in its titles. One of the worst films ever, thank god it's straight-to-dvd, but Diora Baird really looks good here, maybe the reason of my half-star rating,… More
A great premise for a great parody, but instantly went downhill as it recycled jokes from the movies with "movie" in its titles. One of the worst films ever, thank god it's straight-to-dvd, but Diora Baird really looks good here, maybe the reason of my half-star rating, because this should have been a zero for me.