Vampires Suck
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"Vampires Suck" is a comedy about contemporary teen angst and romance movies. Becca, an anxious, non-vampire teen, is torn between two boys. Before she can choose, Becca must get around her controlling father, who embarrasses Becca by treating her like a child. Meanwhile, Becca's friends contend with their own romantic issues -- all of which collide at the prom.

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Rotten Tomatoes Score: 5%

Critic Reviews from Rotten Tomatoes

"It's almost as cynical as the actual Twilight, and not nearly as funny."
‑ Rafer Guzman, Newsday
"This movie sucks more."
‑ Peter Travers, Rolling Stone
"It's been two whole years since the team of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer subjected us to one of its godawful parodies. Alas, the vacation is over."
‑ Randall King, Winnipeg Free Press
"Vampires Suck, and films like it, not only fail to parody elements of contemporary society, they barely spoof the genre they are trying to mock."
‑ W. Scott Poole, PopMatters
"An insult to other bad vampire movies, which is saying a mouthful."
‑ Dennis Schwartz, Ozus' World Movie Reviews
"All but the most die-hard fans can agree that the Twilight movies are spoof-worthy. So it's too bad they don't get a worthy spoof."
‑ Elizabeth Weitzman, New York Daily News
"Below bottom-of-the-barrel."
‑ Nick Schager, Time Out New York
"With the level of humor here running to flatulence jokes, groin kicks and high-school smart-aleck cracks, their movie does, indeed, (surely no other critic in the world will be this clever) SUCK!"
‑ Dennis King, Tulsa World
"For the most part, the jokes are mildly relevant at least"
‑ Kevin Carr, 7M Pictures
"There are few things worse than watching a comedy flatline for over an hour, tossing its "funny parts" into a vacuum of uncomfortable silence."
‑ John Gholson, Cinematical
"A few broader references might have made this punishing one-note trawl through the eminently spoofable tween-vamp saga slightly more watchable."
‑ Tom Huddleston, Time Out
"Plenty of gags fall flat, but writer-directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer... have tapped the vein more effectively than their norm, with enjoyable details and on-the-mark senseless brutality."
‑ Michael Ordoņa, Los Angeles Times
"A witless, slavish pastiche of the series of romantic dramas based on Stephenie Meyer's Twilight novels. It is a knowing film that knows nothing about comedy."
‑ Philip French, Observer [UK]
"I know comedy is subjective, so grant me that Vampires Suck just did not make me laugh. It probably doesn't help that, as a spoof on the Twilight franchise, it's making fun of movies I also don't enjoy."
‑ Mark Bell, Film Threat
"A banal mess that sacrifices anything resembling satire for a series of smutty jokes."
‑ James Luxford, The National
More reviews for Vampires Suck on Rotten Tomatoes

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