Van Roberts (fb1035940305)

Knock Off R

KNOCK OFF is a knock-out! The title of this Jean Claude Van Damme actioneer refers to cheaply made goods sold as counterfeit versions of designer brand name products, such as watches, baby dolls and track shoes. Asian action movie maestro Tsui Hark, who helmed DOUBLE TEAM, has teamed up again with the Muscles from Brussels and they have forged a first-rate, rock’em, sock’em yarn about global smuggling and terrorism set against the scenic backdrop of exotic Hong Kong. While previous Van Damme vehicles have rarely strayed from their sober, straight-up storytelling strategies, KNOCK OFF delivers its karate chops with comic kicks that boost it far above the usual kung-fu fare. No, Van Damme is not trying to imitate Jackie Chan with his Charlie Chaplin-esque martial arts antics. Instead, Hark and Van Damme finally appear to be having fun sending up a genre where plot and character take the backseat to body blows. Street hustling playboy Marcus Ray (Jean-Claude Van Damme of MAXIMUM RISK) once specialized in knock off merchandise, but he has reformed recently and gone legitimate. Paired with abrasive business partner Tommy Hendricks (Rob Schneider of JUDGE DREDD), Marcus lives life to the hilt in Hong Kong as a sales representative for V-Six Jeans. He races around town in his sleek BMW singing his favorite tunes while Tommy struggles to keep their business afloat. The bubble bursts for Marcus abruptly when he learns that his adopted brother and long-time competitor Eddie (Wyman Wong) has gotten caught up in an evil conspiracy to smuggle knock-off wares with miniature explosives.These micro-bombs resemble harmless wristwatch batteries until they are detonated. Although the KGB developed these easy-to-conceal explosive devices, the Russian mafia somehow got their grubby paws on them. Joining forces with another sleazy knock-off artist, Skinny (Glen Chin), they plan to inundate the U.S. market with their imitation inventory. Eventually, when enough stuff winds up stateside, Skinny, the Russian mafia, and a mysterious mastermind behind the plan aim to extort huge sums ore trigger the fireworks. While plot bristles with incredible, hyperbolic action sequences, explosions, and tough-guy gab, the filmmakers deviate from the usual obligatory set-pieces. Instead of a car chase, a nifty rickshaw race through heavily thronged Hong Kong generates excitement and comedy. A nerdy looking Russian villain sports spectacles whose lens double as razor-sharp blades. The acrobatic gunfight take on added suspense because they are staged on ships whose heaving decks hurl giant cargo containers perilously toward our heroes and villains. When Eddie uncovers these tiny mines in his staples, he scuttles the shipment to the bottom of Hong Kong Bay. The greedy villains retaliate and set him up. Actually, Eddie dies when he rifles his own safe and finds it booby-trapped with a small rocket that turns him into a Roman candle. Meanwhile, the bad guys prey on Marcus and Tommy. The Hong Kong Royal Police question our protagonists about poor Eddie, but Marcus and Tommy play dumb. Dumb buys them with the fuzz, but dumb fizzles when the feisty international sales vice president, Karen (Lela Rochon of WAITING TO EXHALE), shows up and demands answers. Confronting them about shipments of bogus jeans, she accuses Marcus and Tommy of cheating V-Six out of $4 million. Matters grow complicated when Marcus discovers that Tommy works undercover as an agent for tip-lipped CIA honcho Harry Johansson (Paul Sorvino of GOODFELLAS) in Hong Kong. The CIA operates out of an elaborately disguised headquarters, concealed in James Bond fashion, in a gigantic Buddhist shrine atop a mountain on Lantau island. Somehow, Marcus and Tommy stay one step ahead of the fleet-footed, gun-toting Russian henchmen and manage to lay their hands on a videotape that implicates Karen in the black market. The rousing Steven E. De Souza screenplay is the stuff of which formula melodramas are forged. Having written hits like 48 HRS and DIE HARD, De Souza knows his craft by heart. Several elements distinguish the De Souza screenplay. Indeed, the story boasts a beginning, a middle, and an end. The ending is especially cute with its O Henry flavor. Not only is this yarn well-woven, but KNOCK OFF also packs a surprise or two. Marcus and Tommy defy an endless gauntlet of danger. Happily, Van Damme impersonates a civilian instead of the usual cop hero who headlines such sagas.

Avatar PG-13

The highly touted and long anticipated AVATAR from writer & director James Cameron of TITANIC fame qualifies as an exciting sci-fi culture clash about greedy humans that occupy a planet and try to plunder its unique mineral worth a million fortunes. AVATAR takes place in the year 2145 on the distant planet of Pandora. The complication is that an entire race of cobalt blue-skinned, Zulu-type humanoid aliens called the Na'vi live at the base of the gigantic tree where the minerals lay hidden beneath the soil. The story is as venerable as any cavalry western where either the sympathetic lieutenant or trusty scout joins an Indian tribe living on a gold field about which they have no knowledge. Although the hero acts as a go-between, he winds up serving the interests of the Indians who want to preserve the land rather than his own people who want to rape it. Unfortunately, Cameron provides nothing fresh to this DANCES WITH WOLVES narrative. Actually, the AVATAR plot is reminiscent of the legendary romance between Pocahontas and Captain John Smith. Nevertheless, despite its imposing two hour and forty minute running time, Cameron maintains enough momentum to see things through to the final confrontation between the hero and the villains. Some of the technology that the avaricious earthlings bring to the planet will remind you of the second ALIEN movie, ALIENS, that was helmed by none other than Cameron. Of course, GAMER and SURROGATES beat Cameron to the punch with their stories about avatar manipulated by recumbent humans. After his brother is shot and killed by a mugger, Jack Scully--who is paralyzed from the waist down--is selected to replace him. A former Marine, Scully is taken to the distant Pandora where he will become part of a diplomatic mission to reach some kind of agreement with the Navi to get access to this fortune. The story here is as old as any western where the young lieutenant or scout becomes a part of the tribe and eventually acts in the interests of their preservation instead of the greed of his own people. Writer & director James Cameron provides nothing fresh to this DANCES WITH WOLVES narrative. The special effects are frankly incredible, but you do not have to see this movie in 3-D because it really does not do anything with the 3-D the way most movies do. The planet of Pandora with its floating mountains and luminous fauna is a treat for the eye. Stephen Lang makes a terrific villain who wants to see this peaceful but noble people destroyed.

The Bridge on the River Kwai PG

The best World War II movie ever made. They actually built a genuine bridge and then blew it up. William Holden and Alec Guiness head up a fabulous cast. Fantastic!

The Magnificent Seven Unrated

Director John Sturges' remake of Akira Kurosawa's 1954 epic "Seven Samurai" ranks as one of the greatest westerns ever made. Along with Robert Aldritch's shoot'em saga "Vera Cruz," "The Magnificent Seven" exerted considerable influence the look and subject matter of many later Spaghetti westerns. Sturges had gained an impressive reputation in the genre with two contemporary westerns "The Walking Hills and "Bad Day at Black Rock" as well as his frontier oaters "The Law and Jake Wade," "Gunfight at the O.K. Corral," and "Last Train from Gun Hill." Sturges specialized in all-male actioneers with tough guys in the life and death situations. Visually, he relied on low-angle photography to give his pictures a larger-than-life look, and he staged his gunfight sequences as if they were football game strategies. Sturges began a long association with "The Ten Commandants" composer Elmer Bernstein on "The Magnificent Seven." Not only did Bernstein receive an Oscar nomination for Best Original Score for his music on "The Magnificent Seven," but he also got an Oscar nod when he reprised his score in Burt Kennedy's 1966 sequel "Return of the Seven." Aside from Sturges' masterful direction, "The Magnificent Seven" boasts a top-notch cast. Sturges was largely responsible for these brilliant casting choices.Many of them, including Steve McQueen, James Coburn, Robert Vaughn, and Charles Bronson, achieved superstar prominence during the 1960s. "The Magnificent Seven" was lensed on location by Charles Lang in Durango, Mexico, and on some rather obvious sets at Churubusco Studios, Mexico City. Lang had filmed "Gunfight at the O.K. Corral" as well as "Last Train from Gun Hill" with Sturges and would go on to shoot the unlikeliest Sturges movie "A Girl Named Tamiko." "The Magnificent Seven" takes place in the late 19th century. The first scene occurs in a small, anonymous Mexican village as a bandit, Calvera (Eli Wallach of "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly"), and his 40 gunmen steal enough food to feed themselves. After Calvera and his gang depart, the campesinos convene in the square to formulate a plan of defense. "If he takes our crop, we might as well cut our throats and be done with it," laments one farmer. They visit the Old Man (Russian character actor Vladimir Sokoloff of "Cloak and Dagger")and seek his advice. "Fight," he urges them. "Go to the border and buy guns." The frontier west has settled down and our heroes are roaming the land in search of work. Chris (Oscar winning actor Yul Brynner of "The King and I") and Vin cross paths in a dusty little hamlet when the local citizens refuse to let an Indian named Old Sam be buried in a predominantly white cemetery. "How long has this been going on?" inquires a traveling salesman. "Since the town got civilized," remarks the undertaker, Chamlee (Whit Bissell) and tries to give corset salesman Henry (Val Avery of "The Anderson Tapes") his twenty dollars back. Three of the villagers arrive in town as Chris and Vin decide to drive the hearse up to Boot Hill. "Never ridden shotgun on a hearse," quips Vin. Chris wounds two men trying to block their way and the townspeople unload the coffin and bury it. The three villagers approach Chris and ask him to help them buy guns. "Men are cheaper than guns," Chris advises them and they assemble six men. The pay is a double eagle for four to six weeks with food and board thrown into the bargain. So moved is Chris by their earnestness that he decides to help them. "I've been offered a lot for my work," he assures the Mexicans, "but never everything." Initially, Vin is reluctant about joining up. When he learns the job pays twenty dollars, he shrugs, "Would pay for my bullets." The third man to join up is gold-seeking Harry Luck (Brad Dexter) who believes that there must be more to it if the Cajun-speaking Chris has decided to him the villagers. Bernando O'Reilly (Charles Bronson) is chopping wood for his breakfast when Chris offers him twenty dollars. "Right now that's a lot of money," he agrees. Britt (James Coburn) and Lee (Robert Vaughn) and a Mexican farmer turned gunfighter, Chico (German born actor Horst Buchholz), follow. At first, Chico doesn't make the grade but later he proves his worthiness. The seven teach the villagers to defend themselves with rifles they obtain from Calvera's men sent to spy on them. They also erect new walls in the village. "They won't keep me out," Calvera surveys them on his return to the village with his forty gunmen. Chris explains, "They were made to keep you in." A gunfight erupts. All seven survive the first foray, but the triumphant villagers are caught off-guard when Calvera's men hang around. When combat breaks out again, the villagers split into fractions. Half decide hiring the seven constituted a mistake. Chris and company change tactics, mount an offensive against Calvera, but find his camp empty. When they arrive back in the village, the seven discover that one fraction has sold them out, but Calvera refuses to kill them. He fears that their friends from up north might retaliate so he takes their guns and lets his men escort them to the border. "The Magnificent Seven" brims with irony. The Old Man advises the villagers to buy guns, but Chris tells them that men with guns are cheaper. Although the hiring price of twenty dollars is low, the high-priced O'Reilly joins because "right now twenty dollars is a lot." Similarly, Chris signs on because nobody has ever paid him everything. Lee suffers from paranoia so he decides to hide out in the worst place imaginable. "The final supreme idiocy," he confesses, "a deserter hiding out on a battlefield." The performances are memorable as is William Roberts' dialogue. In one scene, Vin observes, "It took me a long time to learn my elbow from a hot rock." "The Magnificent Seven" qualifies as my favorite western.