| Movie | Rating | Review | Date | Your Rating | Match | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Star Trek - PG-13 |
you know that look people get on "antique road show" when the appraiser tells them that the piece of junk they've had for years is really a collectors item worth a lot, lot more? if you grew up with this series like i did...get ready to wear that look.
if you didn't grow up with the series, so what, it's summer blockbuster time baby! |
May 11, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Sadko (The Magic Voyage of Sinbad) - PG |
altho made in 1952 this seems as if a silent film from the grand old age somehow made with sound and color (which makes no sense i know). magic permeates this, the magic of childhood, the perception of childhood, the perception that believes in Christmas because NOT to believe was even worst than however foolish believing made one. a russian tale of adventure innocently yet stirringly told, of a journey (doh!), a little romance, some action, etc., etc., etc.
! |
May 11, 2009 | N/A | |||
| The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past - PG-13 |
i've always thought that the heart and soul of dicken's "a christmas carol" was the bit about the late night visit from 3 ghosts ("you might be a bit of undigested beef," said scrooge) and so i imagined that this film, borrowing that stardust, might merit.
i was wrong. practically the absolute opposite of x-men:origins which uses beefcake so terribly that it becomes beef frosting, this one uses cheesecake exactly to the same effect. |
May 10, 2009 | N/A | |||
| X-Men Origins - Wolverine - PG-13 | this reminds me of something, but i can't quite remember what it is. all i do remember is that instead of a story you had guys growling at each other about something that happened before...then a break...then more growling...another break...more growling...then...whammo...fight!...what movie was it? waitaminnut, that wasn't no movie, it's every WWF "event"! | May 10, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Li'l Abner - Unrated | the tradition of using hokum humor to make valid social points goes back a long way and al capp's "li'l abner" was a formidable addition, especially for a newspaper comic strip, to that interesting form. unfortunately li'l of capp's sarcasm and wit makes it to this movie version (that never happens in the movies!). tho granville owen is a dead ringer for al capp's creation (and i don't know if that's a good or bad thing), the throwaway hollywood treatment is more like a valentine than real love. buster keaton's here too. | May 8, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Film Crew: Wild Women of Wongo - Unrated | a one star movie made two stars better by the MST crew heckling in the background, natch. filmed in beautiful florida (hey! that's where they filmed "flipper" too! calm down, little johnny) this epic was simply an exploitive reason to get men and women to dress in loincloths and to run around like they were prehistoric types (they've never done THAT in hollywood before!) and to rassle one another, what joy. JUST like it was way back when... | May 7, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Super Size Me - PG-13 | it's not a real movie, simply a sensible warning presented as if it were a documentary. with occasional flashes of humor spurlock does make his point, which was obvious at the very beginning: fast food is not good for you. he does have a creative way of making his point though, and this bit of cultural phenomena enters the national conversation legitimately. | May 2, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Crank 2: High Voltage - R |
nonsensical. audacious. salacious. loud. boorish. vain. improbable.
but instant gold. imminiently rewatchable. dvd classic already. yer 14 year olds will make you burn this in your kitchen sink, but they'll get another one and still keep you up nights. i liked it. and filmed in the beautiful silverlake area of l.a., what could go wrong? |
May 1, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Obsessed - PG-13 | beyonce was doing her best to be sophisticated and swah-ve, but den dis skinny white ho messes wid her man, and den wid her chile, honey, and den whass a girl to do but go n' get all ghetto on her stupid white ass!?! beyonce resurrects the black chick flick market with this overlong catfight-in-the-making you understand 10 minutes after sitting down, contributing two emotions ("honey, i love you" and "ahm gonna get you sucker!") and several nice tunes. mr. elba tries not to look too much like the hulk in a suit while still keeping his ooze appeal (he succeeds). but this film belongs to ms. larter as the villain, the producers unknowingly putting the juiciest part in the ablest hands. | May 1, 2009 | N/A | |||
| The Soloist - PG-13 |
egad, but a "serious" film, with oscar boys downey jr. and foxx recommending the "serious" aesthetic. "lost genius now is found (hey, that's almost biblical)"...who could complain? but there's more. call now and we'll include a "serious" social issue filmed in it's actual surroundings at absolutely no extra charge. thank Yahweh for ms. keener, who offers some of the piece's only humor (a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down...and that's not biblical, doh!) to make the work people friendly. still worth a view.
and i got to see a coupla my old friends there in the city of angels... |
May 1, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Sleeper - PG | a young man's loving homage to his loves, like chaplin, keaton, lloyd, et al, and why not, and diane keaton (in perhaps the film that made her) his infectiously charming paramour at the time, and the old time new orleanian jazz music (or is it klezmer) (which, again, the man loves, hell, he plays it), which makes for one big charismatic matzo ball from the '70's, vey is mir! the last allen film perhaps before he became the writer/director mangod he's known as nowadays. | April 30, 2009 | N/A | |||
| The Informers - R | i like a film that confirms the ideas i already have and this one from brad easton ellis is just the thing. ok, the film fails some by using self-indulgent overdosing of drugs and sex as an excuse for moral terpitude instead of the other way round, but why quibble? hollow people who are losing even the knowledge of their hollowness, losing the desperation that that knowledge might resusitate...that's good filmmaking. modern noir. me likey. | April 29, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Earth (Disneynature's Earth) (Planet Earth) - G | with a voiceover by a friendlier darth vader (james earl jones) and lotsa big screen flyover shots of big friggen country and, but of course, lotsa cute animals being cute out in the big country, well, you're simply proud to be a part of the plan. i was. | April 27, 2009 | N/A | |||
| 17 Again - PG-13 | a "star vehicle" is a film basically tailored to it's pop star's strong points (i think) and so zac efron, the latest hollywood manufactured wonder boy, comes down from vidal sassoon to stupify us with his manufactured zing. could this be the next brad pitt? thomas lennon alone in the cast is unimpressed. | April 27, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Women In Love - R | April 20, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Sunshine Cleaning - R | amy adams continues her relentless rise to the top of the hollywood crop, sure to be a reigning grande dame by the time she's 25, with a effort that showcases hard life in a desert town. once a popular cheerleader in high school and living on her looks, she now faces a series of inexplicable rejections and has to plot a new life course. her stoner sister is no help, and gramps (alan arkins' signature role of late) is a bit on the eccentric side. what's a go-getter to do? unfortunately formulaic yet charming nonetheless. | April 20, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Observe and Report - R | you've got to be careful who you snub in high school as there seems the best revenge of modern times is that they'll make a film outing you later. here, the mumbled and whispered lunchroom protests of those picked on by the local bully ("he'll prolly wind up a mall cop!") are given full volume as those greasy speculations are given the major release film treatment. rogen throws himself into the effort, a poor man's taxi driver, the less-than-everyman who takes himself waaay too seriously, but at least his mom's a drunk, so he's got an excuse for being a gorilla in a uniform. | April 20, 2009 | N/A | |||
| State of Play - PG-13 | and now for the news: there's corruption in washington again. talk about phoning in a performance, crowe didn't even bother to lose the weight he's gained since his last shoot. more soap opera than political thriller, it'll be on dvd before i finish writing this | April 20, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Chatham (The Golden Boys) - PG | i didn't even know this one was out there but, following a group of nothing but silver-haired types into the local multiplex (as opposed to a group of squealin skateboardin cellphonin pimplepoppers headin for "hannah montana"), i found this relic warped from the days of abc's movie-of-the-week as the old new wave (carradine, torn, and dern, their wild, capricious, potsmokin, f-ck-the-man, "we do it our way" days of the '70's long behind them) dust off their best eastcoaster accents and entertain entertainin ms. hemingway's competent though lonely spinster. who'll get the girl? is the most action this quaint "senior entertainment" vehicle offers. | April 20, 2009 | N/A | |||
| So Long at the Fair - Unrated | sounds good, and ruby likes it, so i'm in. | April 18, 2009 | N/A | |||
| A Farewell to Arms - Unrated | it's a '30's HOLLYWOOD movie, not the hemingway book, so first get over your lit pretensions. if you can manage that small grace, then this is a quiet and precious film, surprising because it's not cooper that stars, no, but helen hayes who makes every scene she's in resonant, as if she came equipped with her own personal echo chamber. adolphe menjou makes for an smiling and irritating deus ex machina while the coop does his best, the keanu reeves of his day, to simply remain in the work and give life to hemingway's stoic hero. | April 11, 2009 | N/A | |||
| I Love You, Man - R | it's the only film at my local multiplex that deserved to be called "film" (as opposed to, say, movie) with a wonderfully slow intimate build up of the characters so that, by the end, it doesn't seem slow at all and you'd personally invite both of these guys to your own wedding...AND let 'em play in the band, too. pretty good direction, yah, but it's the writing you'll remember, and maybe the first film i can remember that plays those embarassingly painful awkward moments we all have gracefully. | April 4, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Monsters vs. Aliens - PG |
granted, not a lot of story here, sure, and the characterisation's a tad on the thin side, don't be sooo adult, ok, but the 3-D effects are awesome...maybe awesome enough to see twice.
maybe. |
April 4, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Duplicity - PG-13 | the last time i saw a great caper film with juicy hot chemistry between the leads was the first "the thomas crown affair" with steve mcqueen and faye dunaway (if you ain't seen it, see it, and that's an order, pilgrim!). fresh on the heels (!) of that whirlwind effort comes julia roberts and clive owens as ex-undercover ops who want to go undercover again, yowza!, but i'll say no more. it needn't be said (like that ever stopped me) but i have never caught the roberts bug...what was all the brouhaha about anyway...until now, and i stand corrected. less fat, more meat for the eat, see it. | April 4, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Adventureland - R | April 4, 2009 | N/A |
2090 ratings
569 reviews
