| Movie | Rating | Review | Date | Your Rating | Match | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| La Maschera del demonio (Black Sunday) (House of Fright) (Mask of the Demon) - R | The gorgeous setpieces, charmingly silly effects and over-the-top dialogue make for an entertaining piece of horror history. | December 11, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Sky High - Unrated | Review pending... | December 11, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Gothic Vampires from Hell - Unrated |
I wasn't expecting this to be Oscar material. All I was hoping for was some cheesy vampire fun, a decent soundtrack, and maybe some gothic eye-candy. Well, the soundtrack was okay, but the rest I didn't get. It's utterly cringe-worthy. The actors appeared to have been scraped up off the street, regardless of acting talent or whether they look remotely goth (and giving them bad make up and costumes doesn't help either, funnily enough). If you're going to give us actors who don't look that goth, at least make them good actors. Or, if your budget doesn't stretch that far, go to some local alt clubs and find some subculturally pretty people who don't mind being in front of a camera spouting the drivel you call dialogue in exchange for a few dollars/pounds and/or free drinks (also known as the Razorblade Smile approach to casting). I will admit the black female vocalist of the other 'band' was reasonably attractive, and at least could sing fairly well. But that's all the concession you're getting from me on that score.
Shame on you, Cleopatra Records, for associating yourselves with this. Some of you out there will probably want to rent it in order for you and your friends to have a hilarious evening criticising it. If so, enjoy yourselves. Otherwise, stay the hell away. |
December 11, 2009 | N/A | |||
| 9 - PG-13 | December 10, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Hellsing I - Unrated | I'm not sure whether this is the page for the OVA (or even just one volume of the OVA), or the series. Either way they're both good, though I like the series a touch more. | December 4, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Immortal Enemy - Unrated | December 4, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| The Serpent and the Rainbow - R | December 1, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Surf's Up - PG | November 29, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| San wa (The Myth) - Unrated | The plot gives way for spectacular fight choreography for the most part, and some of them are both entertaining and impressive (the production line fight, for example). I found the historical dream narrative more engaging than the contemporary scenes, which often had a faint air of the ridiculous about them (aside from the usual Chan charm, in which things go a bit wrong during combat but it doesn't pose much of a problem). | November 27, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Ink - Unrated | November 24, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| The Devil's Chair - Unrated |
My first impression: fuck every other word does not make for good dialogue. I'm not a prude about swearing, but too much and anything you're trying to put across gets swamped and makes you sound like a 14 year old trying to impress his mates and seem 'hard'. Sadly, the fuck-fest was not the worst of my viewing experience.
Even when Nick West was supposed to be somewhat sympathetic, he appeared to be the kind of person I'd cross the street to avoid. I suppose the hideously sexist, angry drivelling rant of over narration (which actually worked quite well at the beginning bar the extreme potty-mouth) was supposed to be a hint to his true nature. The idea is a decent one on paper/in retrospect, but it was pretty horrid to sit through at the time. The scenes on the 'other side' look effective, but they quickly descend into gore-hound territory and stick there for the duration of their appearance. The dialogue is laughable (seriously), though I suppose the jar between it appearing serious and sounding ridiculous may have been intentional. This was aided by the, ahem, performance, of Matt Berry - star of lovely comedy series such as Garth Marenghi's Darkplace and The IT Crowd. I suppose he had a mortgage to pay. I found Hostel pretty unpleasant viewing, but this film makes it seem rather inoffensive in comparison. |
November 24, 2009 | N/A | |||
| The Little Vampire - PG |
The costumes are gorgeous, and in a way it is pleasingly different to see a film where humans are more likely to be harmed by the vampire hunter than the vampires themselves. However, even for a children's film the dialogue is pretty awful, and the acting is just about bearable (the child actors tend to stretch this the most, but they are children after all, so I suppose we should forgive them).
Overall, it's a children's film which an adult will likely be able to tolerate watching with them. Whether or not the adult will actually like it depends on the adult. |
November 21, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Chikamatsu monogatari (The Crucified Lovers) - Unrated | As someone who is not a film student or critic, I believe I got less out of the film. For a casual viewer, it's still a relatively engaging film provided you're into (period) drama and don't run screaming at subtitles or black and white. | November 19, 2009 | N/A | |||
| The Haunting in Connecticut - PG-13 | November 15, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Amadeus - R | November 12, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Baba Yaga (Kiss Me Kill Me) (The Devil Witch) - Unrated | November 11, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| The Notorious Bettie Page - R | November 9, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Tetsuo II: Body Hammer - R | Basically, I don't feel that this is a worthy sucessor to the original. While the original was confusing and bizarre in a good way, this is just dull and rather uninspired. Perhaps it's because the idea is no longer so shocking and original with the sequel? I don't know. | November 5, 2009 | N/A | |||
| Sick Nurses (Suay Laak Sai) - Unrated | November 2, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Tomie - Unrated | November 2, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Akumu tantei (Nightmare Detective) - Unrated | November 2, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| Gohatto (Taboo) - Unrated | November 2, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| El Mar - Unrated | November 2, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| La Vie en Rose (La Mome) - PG-13 | October 31, 2009 | N/A | ||||
| The Unnamable II: The Statement of Randolph Carter (H.P. Lovecraft's The Unnamable Returns) - Unrated | I enjoyed this more than the first, as the plot was actually more like a Lovecraft story in it's structure and content. It also takes itself a bit less seriously, which makes for better viewing entertainment. It's still fairly average, though enjoyable enough if you're not looking for a masterpiece of horror cinema. I love the realisation of Randolph Carter though, a proper Lovecraftian hero who fights with knowledge rather than weapons and is fond of making dramatic pronouncements. | October 28, 2009 | N/A |
2412 ratings
474 reviews
