valo666

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• 
  I recommend you see...

  Fight Club

  by justin

  NARRATOR: "I started asking myself, what kind of living room suite defines me as a person"
  
  As I write these first few words of this mammoth review, I feel that no matter what I write I am not going to paint an accurate picture of Fight Club for the unfortunate few who have not seen it. So bear with me and make up your own mind but trust me when I cock tell you that this is a movie that you have to see before you die. No exceptions.
  
  Part of me doesent even want to give away how it pans out, because if your anything like me you would sit down to this expecting a mature kind of "Karate-Kid" that sets up one whole fight to be the resolution of everyones problems and thats just not the case at all. In Fight Club, the fighting means so little, and yet it is the core of everything. It's like the fuel on the fire. The fighting is the heart and soul of what drives this movie, but like any other heart and soul, it is rarely seen, it's just completely overshadowed by the effect it has on it's surroundings.
  
  Edward Nortan's nameless characters is a sad, but accurate commentary on the way far too many of us are living our lives. He's a complete blank canvas. He's bored and he doesent even know it. Brainwashed by society cock into beleiving that paying his bills on time, wearing the right tie to work and watchting sit-coms every night is the greatest goal anyone can acheive in their life. He's a man who "has it all". A nice apartmant with gimmicky furniture, a paying job and a nice steady routine he can get bogged down in until he's so old that the best thing he can hope for is not suffering the embaressment of soiling himself infront of his attractive caretaker nurse. But he doesent know he is bored and miserable, so he develops insomnia, which miraculously leads him to his own self awakening nuzzled in the huge, sweaty man-tit's of a former steroid abuser in a prostate cancer self help group. Still what you expected? So he leapfrogs from help group to help group, deriving his own meaning of existence from having cancer one night and heart disease the next. Having people listen and care unquestioningly is something we would all like isnt it?
  
  It could be argued that if we all lived our lives the way Nortans character does (many do) then people would become mechanisms, and the world a perpetual, useless machine. Enter Tyler Durden. The virus, the bug in the system who could make it all come crashing down. He is handsome, smart, charismatic and capable of doing anything he sets his mind to. Brad Pitt does a fantastic job of portraying this beautifully unconventional individual. His grin looks charming and warm, but all you can see is his malicious intent shining through his teeth.
  
  Fight Club is all about boundaries, and breaking through them. This includes breaking the fourth wall. In one scene, both the narrator and Tyler talk to you as if they are completely aware of the fact that you are sitting there watching them, which is refreshing and a little scary at the same time cock.
  
  The performances of the characters were all round impressive, and they needed to be for this calibre of movie. Each characters is perfectly suited to their role. The wirey, exaushted, drugged out look of Helena Bonham Carter as Marla Singer. The depressed, bored, weedy little suttlebug of Edward Nortan as the Narrator. And the charming yet menacing persona of Brad Pitt as Tyler Durden are personalities that will pop up in your head when you come across certain social situations.
  
  To sum this movie up in one word......PRIMAL. It is very very raw. The violence it quite brutal, the humor is dark and satyrical, and the entire experience presents you with an uncomfortable truth, a radical alternative, and one hell of a twist that will make you blurt out "No way!" regardless of whoever is around. Fight Club is comparable to walking up to a dwarf who prefers to be called 'little person', smacking him in the face and telling him to live with being a midget. It's the harsh truth. But in Fight Club, the truth is established at the beginning, the rest of the movie is a simple, systematic dismantlement of our lives. And I loved every second of it. cock
  
  Justins Best Bit: The final half hour will blow you away. This is stellar, polished, movie brass that many others could never hope to hold a candle to.

  jbpelican

  It's a crime against the world that I had not seen Fight Club until about a month ago, and now that I have I wonder how I could have ever done without it. It must have been those first two rules that kept it out of my grasp.....
  
  NARRATOR: "Tyler was selling women their own fat ass's back to them. It was beautiful"

  posted 2 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  Mongol

  by kim

  The first installment of a trilogy on the life of Genghis Khan.The film shows how the events of khans early years lead him to become the legendary conqueror.
  its a great epic story and a must see

  kimbom

  Hey, you should really see this!

  posted 2 days ago
• 
  jxxx84

  Hey - try this quiz and see how we compare
  
  Old Swedish childrenshows (Part two)

  posted 3 days ago
• 
  jxxx84

  Hey - try this quiz and see how we compare
  
  Old Swedish childrenshows (Part two)

  posted 3 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  South Park: Imaginationland: The Movie

  by justin

  BUTTERS: "How am I ser'posed to git home?"
  MAYOR: "Oh, well, all you need to do is click your heels together three times" BUTTERS: "Wow, really?"
  MAYOR: "No you f*cking dipshit! that was a joke!"
  
  South Park has never, ever, ONCE, in all it's seasons, failed to make me laugh. Truly, Imaginationalnd is a real jewel on the South Park crown. It's got everything that makes South Park great. It's got vile, twisted humor, it's got the sharp, witty pokes at society and the government, it's got the "I've learned something today" speeches that speak volumes about the world we live in, it even has the diobolical Christmas Critters and even ManBearPig in the flesh! No matter how much the DVD shop charges for it, buy this or Season 11 (season 11 includes all three Imaginationland episodes) because it will be well worth your money.
  
  It all begins with a bet between Kyle and Cartman. The both of them agreeing that if Cartman could prove leaprochauns exist then Kyle would suck his balls. If not, Cartman owes Kyle $10. As it turns out, Cartman was right, they encounter a Leaprechaun and Cartman begins an obsessive vendetta to force Kyle to suck his balls, no matter the cost. But the leaprechaun had come from Imaginationland to warn of a terrorist attack, a fact the boy's discover when the Imaginationland mayor whisks them off in a balloon to his world. In the attack, all the boys except Butters manage to escape. Butters then witnesses the terrorist blow up the barrier that keeps the evil of Imaginationland at bay, causing our imaginations to start running wild! The rest of the story concerns the struggle for the preservation of Imaginationland and Cartmans quest to make Kyle suck his balls.
  
  It's really a brilliantly constructed story and one of South Parks finest hours. Hearing the defence force issuing a statement about an imaginary terrorist attack, then turning to Mel Gibson for help, is just priceless. There are loads of evil and good imaginary characters for the keen eye to spot and it's nice to see Butters finally having a bit of good luck thrown his way. Do yourself a favor and watch this, because whether your a South Park fan or not, you will find alot to enjoy.
  
  MEL GIBSON: "UUUUUGGGHHHRR my nipples they hurt!!!!!!!"
  
  Justins Best Bit: This is one of those occasions where the entire event itself is a best bit. It's more like one of lifes best bits.

  jbpelican

  The very existence of this South Park epic makes the world a better place.
  
  REPORTER: Couldnt we try sending Kurt Russel into our imagination to try and negotiate with---
  GENERAL: We tried that! And Kurt Russel was raped by Christmas Critters!

  posted 4 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  Dead Space: Downfall

  by justin

  I am a masive gaming nerd, and I'm not too high and mighty to admit it either. One of my favorite parts of any game (especially the ones with interesting plots) is the little tidbits and factoids scattered about the game environment. So when I spyed this on the shelf of my local dvd emporium, I had to watch it. And after watching it I simply must give Dead Space a chop. Mainly cause I wanna know how it ends.
  
  It's very gory, and really seems to set the game up well, but after the chilling horror of the initial alien discovery and the feeling of desperation set in, all the death and survival and hacking limbs become a bit mundane. It tells you at the start that the entire team is dead so theres no suprises as to who will survive, your just waiting to see how they buy it.
  
  The types of characters you have seen all before, the tough as nails heroine (Ripley? *cough* Sarah Connor? *kaff*kaff*) the egotistical, insane beaurocrat who makes the dumb descisions that get people killed ( the mayor of Amity Island in Jaws *cough* *splutter* *wheeze*) the big black guy that dies (.................). In that respect it's not very imaginitive, but the only reason you probably picked this up is because your into your games, and this is the prequal to one so I guess it doesent matter.
  
  Many movies have an appalling habit of releasing a terrible game around the time of their release. The games gets rushed to make release dates, trading in the quality to cash in on the hype. The reversal, movies based off games are almost always even worse, but Downfall is different because it's more a PART of the game itself, rather than a lame interpretation, which makes it so much more bearable to watch. The fluid and smooth animation, with naught but a few stale visual moments, also helps. It's like watching a sick version of the Animatrix.
  
  Dead Space: Downfall may be more of a game accessory than an independent movie, and it may not be entirely perfect but it offers everything a movie-videogame spinoff almost never does. Relevance to the source material for example. To be honest I would like to see an animated movie like this made for alot more games, it sets a good example of how it should be done. The Resistance series would be fantastic for it.
  
  If you plan on playing the game then it's worth watching, if not, theres alot of "inside outy" people to enjoy.
  
  Justins Best Bit: Keep your eye on the blue haired chick, because her death is probably the best one.

  jbpelican

  The game that focuses on strategic dismemberment releases an animated prequal featuring............more dismemberment.

  posted 5 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  Death Race

  by justin

  A metaphorical Jason Voorhees is behind the wheel of a machine gun-toting super armoured muscle car, plunged into an environment and lathered with a script that has been directly extracted from a mental video game. Sound like fun? It is. Get out and see Death Race ASAP, because a small screen just wont to the carnage enough justice.
  
  I dare say the IQ level of latest releases has plummeted, and here is my proof, a video game you watch and dont play, but instead think of all the ways you like it so much better than The Fast and the Furious. Why is it better than The Fast and the Furious? Not wanting to punch the lead actors in the kidney so badly is a good start. Another plus is that it doesent have any unnessacary 'soul searching' for the oh so conflicted hero, its just straight forward, straight to the point no bullshit.
  
  Sure theres the token limp plot that these movies need to stay afloat but it takes no brainpower to follow, it exists soley for the purpose of creating an excuse for mayhem.
  
  The story does however skip one MAJOR piece of information, and just casually references it halfway through. As if to say, "Oh did I mention that? Cause it's kinda important. Yeah", which is a little irritating, but forgiveable. Like most of the movies story aspect. Dont give it alot of thought, because 80% of the screen time is taken up with ridiculous car battles. Literally 80%.
  
  The whole idea of hectic prison death matches broadcast live is an idea I've had for ages, so I'm really cheesed someone else got to it first, but I'm glad it turned out the way it did, which was exactly as I imagined it should. It's actually an intruiging concept, one that could very well be around within the next few decades, so make sure to look back on Death Race as a reference when we actually are watching live streaming of a gigantic semi trailer death machine destroying everything on a race track.
  
  Justins Best Bit: Gigantic death truck.

  jbpelican

  Probably best to get a lift home in a taxi after watching this, cause if you drive home youll run everyone else off the road for no apparant reason.

  posted 8 days ago
• 
  soul3dout

  Hey - try this personality test and see how we compare
  
  Who actress is perfect for you?

  posted 14 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  Religulous

  by kim

  This is a great funny documentary from comedian bill maher on all religions and it will make u question the concept of religion and the problems it brings out.The title is derived from the words religion and ridiculous and if you are a true believer of religion what ever your faith may be this movie will probably offend you.personally bill maher makes sense to me on some religions that i think are ridiculous like scientology and the fact that alot of people believe in the noah's ark story literally and also the story of adam and eve i mean cmon.

  kimbom

  Hey, you should really see this!

  posted 37 days ago
• 
  scottyboy2008

  Hey - try this quiz and see how we compare
  
  r u evil?

  posted 39 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  War, Inc.

  by Dryorophus

  Strange, but a very nice movie..

  jxxx84

  Hey, you should see this movie.
  It's about a assasin that have a trubled history behind him.
  He is the best there is, but here we gonna follow him in a difficult hit...

  posted 50 days ago
• 
  jxxx84

  Hey - try this personality test and see how we compare
  
  What Movie Kiss Are You?

  posted 50 days ago
• 
  I recommend you see...

  Disaster Movie

  Simontbh

  If you're am intelligent person then you would avoid from seeing this film.
  
  Don't recommend it to anyone with more than half a brain cell.

  posted 58 days ago

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