You Hurt My Feelings

I somehow didn't realize it was a Holofcener flick and a few minutes in, I groaned. "It's just like another Nicole Holofcener flick!" As usual, some very funny dialogue and a great premise about self-doubt, white lies, and the price of hearing hard truths gets sabotaged by the director's basic sourness and cynicism about her characters. Neurotic New Yorkers and their little microaggressions, seasoned with self-hatred ,envy, and insecurity? No thanks.

It’s the honey do these pants make me look fat movie. If you really love someone you’re not going to tell the truth so the answer is always no they look great on you. But this movie takes that one premise and adds a bunch of different contexts and the debate regarding what’s appropriate and when is on. In the end they come to the conclusion that truth may be a good policy but maybe not it depends. And that’s your movie. The reason the experts rate it in the area of Gone with the Wind is the movie is pretentious much like movie critics. Whereas the audience rates it more appropriately no doubt not appreciating making such a trivial dilemma of the human condition the basis for an entire movie. Julia Lewis-Dreyfus’s character: “ I know the world is falling about but this is about my own little narcissistic world” Bingo and much of the movie seemed to be about pettiness that only the wealthy, more educated can afford. Still give it 4 stars being a huge fan of Julie Lewis-Dreyfus.

The hubs and I really enjoyed "movie night" watching this. It feels a little "less" romantic comedy than we were expecting. Julia (Louis-Dreyfus) could be funny reading the newspaper (and has). This is more of a drama about family and loving/supporting each other TOO much in subtle ways. STILL enjoyed watching. From our perspective its a soft dive into lies of support/omission and how they impact relationships all around us and eventually erode our confidence in ourselves instead of bolstering it - when we're not getting the same glowing feedback from others. I enjoyed how all the characters in the movie came to see that the love they showed their partners, friends, children by telling them "you are great" was hurtful if it was actually found to be a lie in the end. How it eroded the trust in the whole relationship in a few cases as they started examining whether they could trust anything the other person said. As all good stories they SHOWED the relationship fractures (not in a depressing way either) and eventual healing. How the characters started embracing telling each other the truth in the end (even if painful)...how much more honest they also started being with themselves. And of course the positive impacts on their lives/careers/relationships in general. I only gave 4 stars because in a few places I felt they could have stretched a little further for the pain. Also a few of the "comedy" aspects felt more "Elaine" (the ice cream scenes and the high end furniture store chaise lounger) and a little whiny - than authentic wallowing in self pity realization that we all occasionally have to experience to grow. Minor missed opportunities and I'm sure with focus on keeping the story a little light and in the comedy genre where someone wanted it to be instead of just letting it BE where it wants to be a subtly funny drama. Julia can play serious just fine...and that's NOT a lie of support.

This lives in the micro moments, which I generally love. However, I kept waiting for it to accumulate to true unraveling (a la Force Majeure) and it never quite got there so it felt a bit flat for me. Overall loved the characters and portrayals across the board - was fun to see people I know from completely other zones (e.g., Succession, the Crown, etc.) show up here, and JLD is just so funny always. Perfect length - something about a 90-min movie hits. “Why would I wear a V-neck????” “THIS is a Greek olive oil”

The fact that this has 95% on RT reminds I should never trust the ratings from here! This movie was so boring it actually began to hurt!

My god. Up until now I've know idea what this film was about...🤷

This movie is the film equivalent of a five-paragraph essay. Somehow, even in its purposefully plot-less attempt to be profound, You Hurt My Feelings is super predictable and surface-skimming... down to the "I was almost killed so now I have my priorities straight" moment. It watched like a forced fable, where I kept saying "ALL RIGHT, WE GET IT." This movie is the perfect example of mainstream thinking it can put on some dirty sneakers and a pair of oversized spectacles and call itself "indie." There's just not a lot here. The only thing that saved this movie at all was the believable writing and the gifted cast. Still, once the credits rolled, I had to ask myself what I just watched.

To me it felt like a realistic, even if somewhat light, portrait of the midlife crisis in a relationship, but especially as to the self-doubt about the path we've taken and on which we are so far along it's really not easy to return. There's the realization that we may really not be the best in our activities, though good enough. Compounded by the challenge of being involved in a young adult offspring's path. Julia Dreyfus has made some thoughtful films.

Great! JLD goes from strength to strength.

Loved it. Absolutely nailed the female hypocrisy of wanted an 'honest opinion'. which they never really do, then being horrified and angry when they get it. Spot on